Managing Expectations

expectationsWe all can benefit from getting help with our businesses, but have you ever looked at your hiring expectations? It’s typical for business owners to reach out to others for assistance with issues we’re not sure how to resolve. We certainly cannot, and most of don’t want to, do it all.

However, when you feel that you’re incapable of solving a problem and you think hiring someone else is the ‘magic bullet’, it’s a clue that it’s time to examine your own (energetic) expectations. No journey that starts with anticipating problems will ever end with good results.

Expectations and Experience

The energy with which we hire others will be reflected in our experience, both of them and their work.

When we’re aligned with the expectation of difficulty, struggle, and irritation, it’s pretty likely that is also what we’ll attract in the support personnel and advisors we hire. The Universe is a BIG YES machine, mirroring back to us what we believe and expect.

This mirroring is also known as the Law of Attraction, which is working 24/7, whether you’re aware of it or not. Like energy is always aligning. That’s great news when your focus is positive and uplifting, but not so great when you’re entrenched in a gnarly problem.

How deeply you feel about a problem gives a clue to how emotionally attached you’ve become, and where it’s time to let go.

When I feel desperate to solve a problem, hiring others to help me is not the best action to take. The intense focus on the problem is, whether we like it or not, adding more energy to the problem that to a solution.

Instead, I’ve learned to manage my own energetic expectations, first. Until I shift out of my problem-focus, real solutions cannot present themselves. The energy of the problem and the solution(s) are at opposite ends of the spectrum. My job is to shift my expectations to the solutions end, open my mind to possibilities, and find better-feeling thoughts. As I do, the solutions become visible to me.

Get clear about the solution you’re seeking: How do you feel when you’ve discovered a solution? Happy? Relieved? Amazed? Appreciative? Satisfied? Whatever you feel, those will be awesome emotions for you to focus upon and pre-pave as you consider who to hire and the fabulous outcome of working with them!

Once you’re clear on how you want the solution to feel, open your mind to possible solutions you’ve never considered. None of us know *everything*, even when it feels like we’ve tried everything.

Hire your assistants and advisors from the place of knowing great solutions exist, how it is you want to feel when the work is completed, and how much you enjoy the working relationship(s). This is how you manage your own hiring expectations!

Image Credit: Barry-Jansson & Associates
based on imageS FROM Costasz and teerawit

Vibration or Bio-Chemical?

vibration_or_biochemical_paleoFor years now, I have understood and been teaching the power of vibrational alignment. I don’t just teach this stuff, I live it and apply it to every area of my life! This also means that much of my life is a work in progress as I move toward what I am desiring to create…each improvement leads to a new vantage point from which to decide ‘what’s next?’. This constant growing is, as they say, what keeps life force flowing through me.

Sometimes, though, life experiences have me questioning what I know to be true. Questioning everything until you receive answers that feel right can be a good thing. This time, I am questioning if the food we consume is only affected by our vibration (as some teachers say) or if there is more to the story.

Last week, I was sharing with my friend, Jeannette Maw (the Good Vibe Coach), how much I am appreciating eating Paleo (no dairy or wheat/grains) for the past 10 months *despite* the energy that I had been flowing about it when I started:

With Paleo, the energy I was flowing in advance was MAJOR SKEPTICISM shifting to MILD WONDER. That’s what I was flowing. I had heard about it for a while and thought it was just a fad. Then, someone I respect shared some resources and I began researching. I was reading a doctor’s website where he systematically showed how it was the most beneficial diet for humans, way above vegetarianism which he had also tried and found defective.

If only a fraction of the benefits that doctor listed were true, I thought it was worth trying…BUT…a huge part of me (not just my butt) didn’t think it was even possible to live without eating wheat! I’ve been a baker since a kid and couldn’t imagine *enjoying* a life without wheat/grains. Bread I might be able to pass on, but pastas, rice, cookies, cakes, doughnuts?!? NO WAY!

That’s why I set a timeline and gave myself an OUT if it was too hard. Instead, I was shocked to find it was easy! I didn’t get what I believed or was suspecting AT ALL!

There is NO WAY that this experience with Paleo was “just about my vibration”. There HAS to be more to the story…chemical…biochemical?!? It’s not about emotions either, for folks who claim you can only lose weight if you have your emotions worked out. Once I started eating Paleo, I lost more weight than ever with no effort and no emotional ‘work’.

After that, Jeannette just wrote a blog post about when our expectations don’t match results and briefly mentions our conversation as proof that I must have been flowing a positive expectation.

You see, Abraham teaches that when you enjoy your food, then it’s good for your body and you will metabolize it well (i.e., be at a good weight and feel healthy). Likewise, Abraham says, when you don’t enjoy eating food, then it’s not good for your body and you suffer the consequences.

Now, I have mostly been a meat-eater, but I started eating Vegetarian a few years ago because I *expected* it would be healthier for me. That was the intention and energy with which I approached this change in my diet, but that was not my experience. While I was eating Vegetarian, I very much enjoyed the food, yet still my brain felt muddled, I felt lethargic, and gained weight around the middle. I also pulled back on exercising because I had no energy, which compounded the weight-gain. I actually enjoy exercising, but while eating Vegetarian I’d be so worn out afterward and needed lots’o’naps! I’ve since heard that this is a common experience and a major reason why Vegetarians shift to eating Paleo.

Meanwhile, I kept hearing people rave about eating Paleo. As I mentioned to Jeannette, for almost 2 yrs, I dismissed eating Paleo as a ‘fad’, then researched it with major skepticism. Looking back, I researched it mainly to prove to myself why it was not worthy of my attention. I’m laughing as I type this realizing the vibrational discord on this subject!

In fact, I was so doubtful that when I finally decided to try eating Paleo, I set the intention for only 30 days, I gave myself an easy OUT that I would stop immediately if it didn’t feel healthy to my body.

I also made dietary modifications in advance of starting to eat Paleo! Reading that the strict Paleo can be difficult for anyone to handle if they don’t have a ‘health reason’ for sticking to it, one site recommended that we make allowances for a few foods that technically aren’t Paleo. My allowances are Greek Yogurt (technically dairy, but high in protein and probiotics) and dark chocolate. Pretty sure the cave men didn’t have chocolate but would have EATEN IT if it was a choice! 😉 I also chose to include potatoes and rice in the grain category, but allow legumes because I like them in my beef chili (with fresh diced onions and Greek Yogurt!). Mmmmmm…it’s so good!

Anyway, within the first week, with no sugar withdrawals and no feelings of deprivation, I not only LOVED it but the cravings for wheat-based foods that had been a life-long desire had vanished completely! With the cravings gone, I enjoy eating so much more and lost at least 2 dress sizes (maybe more) without effort. Eating this way is effortless for me, so maintenance is easy. Now I understand what they mean when they say it’s less a diet and more of a lifestyle choice.  My taste buds clearly have changed: 3 months later, when I saw sugary wheat or milk-based stuff, it made me gag. I remember how those baked goods tasted, but have no desire to eat it again.

With the cravings gone, I noticed that I enjoy vegetables and fruits so much more than ever before. They now taste so much better than when I was eating Vegetarian! Talk about ironic. This is NOTHING like what I was expecting or the energy I was flowing in advance. I was practically DARING it not to work!

NOW, when I look back to when I used to eat the dairy & wheat-based stuff…I LOVED THEM…even though they weren’t good for my body! I thoroughly enjoyed eating them. According to Abraham and Jeannette, they must have been really good for my body except how awful I felt. Clearly, despite loving the food, it wasn’t healthy for me.

The Deliberate Creator in me is well aware of the power of our vibration, thoughts, feelings, and emotions…but THIS experience has shown me that there is way MORE involved! Clearly, when my body got what it needed in nutrients, it figured out the rest despite my doubting vibration. Plus, I’ve heard that while a large percentage of us do well on Paleo, a smaller percentage actually does do well on the Vegetarian diet that didn’t work for me. That tells me there is also a bio-chemical issue at hand.

I recognize that with every thought, our brain cascades chemicals to the body, so there is a biochemical factor to every thought and experience. LOA purists may say that I must have been flowing a positive vibration, but I know that is not true in this instance. This experience showed me that even with major skepticism/doubt, a positive outcome can be created!

Yes, I was skeptical before I even started eating Paleo and that negative vibrational start should have had an equal affect on my experience. Still, I took each step in *good faith*, approaching each meal with the attitude of “what do I feel like eating that is Paleo-compliant?”. When I noticed at the end of the first week how easy it had been, how good my body felt (light yet fully satiated), how the hunger and bloating was gone, and how much more energy I had, I was delighted! I proceeded with that feeling of delight, and a month later when I started noticing weight loss (I no longer have a scale, so I don’t know how much), that was icing on the proverbial cake…gluten-free, of course!

What are your thoughts about vibration versus bio-chemical response?

 

Image: © Ernie Garcia

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