The Ultimate Commitment

Ultimate Commitment - 450w[This article about the ultimate commitment  was previously published on AffirmingSpirit.com. It has been revised and updated for the enjoyment of blog-readers.]

The Ultimate Commitment is the most important commitment you will make in your lifetime.

When we think about important commitments in our lives, we usually think of things like marriage, children, career, family, and so forth. No doubt, all of those are important, but what is the value of these commitments when one isn’t living well, not eating healthy or exercising, have no time for yourself or your thoughts, and are in a constant state of stress and/or survival mode?

The Ultimate Commitment

The ultimate commitment is the one most often forgotten: Commitment to Self. When I use the word Self, I am not talking about mindless selfishness or the-world-revolves-around-me narcissism. I am talking about the commitment to all of you: Your body, mind, and spirit, and the on-going well-being of all three. Another term for this is self-care.

Making the Time
Women, particularly, often find it easier to commit to helping others than to helping themselves. The irony is that we are really failing those we love and want to help when we haven’t taken care of our own needs first. The woman who makes certain she has regular self-care is not only happier, but also the one who then has the most to give others.

Your overall well-being, including mental attitude, nutrition, exercise, relaxation, and good sleep are the foundation for creating success in other areas of your life. A small amount of time each day invested in taking care of all of you, body-mind-spirit, will pay rich dividends. When you nurture these aspects of who you are, you will feel a deeper sense of gratitude that connects you better to those around you and to your passions. Your commitments to marriage, children, career, and family will feel like less of a burden, and more of a blessing. Everyone around you benefits.

Taking care of oneself is actually one of the least selfish things you can do.

Change the World
Looking for a way to build a better world? Begin where you are by focusing on making yourself happy. The ripple effect will transform those around you, and those around them, and so on!

ultimate commitment - least selfish

When I was a newly-single mother trying to juggle a full-time job with motherhood, I was fortunate enough to participate in a single-parenting support group. The first session, the counselors told us that we each needed to find time for ourselves everyday to fill up our ‘Mommy’ bank—that never-ending source of unconditional love and support that our children need and draw upon.

At first, this made no sense to me and even seemed selfish. But, then I started noticing…on the days that I had a chance to exercise or have quiet time to myself, I was much happier around my son and his behavior seemed more manageable. What appeared as better behavior was, in part, due to my calmness around him coupled with an enhanced ability to cope when issues arose. Both of us benefited when I committed to my own self-care.

Since that time, I have made a commitment to take care of myself, and have watched my son grow into a happy, motivated, high school junior. There were ups and downs along the way, but what kept me sane and grounded was the time I took to take care of my body, mind, and spirit. I’ve never regretted the time I took to take care of myself so I could be a better parent, but I can’t say the same about other activities.

The Self-Care Secret
Recently, the Oprah Winfrey show featured women who looked young for their age. All of them had these things in common: They had positive mental attitudes, exercised regularly, took good care of their skin, and spent their days doing things that they truly loved. The show was incredibly inspiring, and proved that taking care of yourself not only makes life more enjoyable, it keeps you looking younger, and makes you more healthy!

If you are feeling resentful of the demands on your time, this is your wake-up call to make a shift. Take time to notice what’s working, and what’s not. Release what is no longer working for you, and make a plan to do more of what is working for you! I can’t make this change for you. Your neighbor can’t make any changes. It’s all up to you.

Your current and future health and well-being rest on your commitment to self. Regardless of how much you have to change, the good news is that you don’t have to do it all at once. Start by making one change a week. You can easily change one aspect of your life this week, and get the ball rolling.

Affirming Your Best
One of the best ways to nurture a positive attitude is by creating and using positive affirmations. Feeding your mind a steady diet of positive thoughts is a very powerful and effective way of building your self-esteem and creating positive change for your life. The brain does not know the difference between reality and perceived reality, so as you read and say affirmations repeatedly, the brain begins to see it as reality.

Even more important is the emotion behind those words and thoughts. Heart science has proven that positive thoughts combined with emotion causes our heart, and the electro-magnetic field it generates, to vibrate in coherence. This coherent state causes all the organs of the body to function better as well as the release of beneficial hormones in the brain. Our body literally *shifts* energetically to embrace positive change!

ultimate commitment - feeling is key

Change, in itself, is neither good nor bad. Change is what we make of the experience. For example, underweight people might be happy for weight gain, whereas overweight people would not be so enthusiastic. How you feel about the change in your life is key to how you will experience it.

Change can be daunting unless you prepare your mind for the process, which is precisely what affirmations can do for you. When you say your affirmations, do you feel uplifted and happy? If so, you know that you are ready for that change to take place. If not, either the wording of the affirmation or it’s intention, the meaning behind the affirmation, is not aligned with what you really want.

For instance, if you say you want to lose weight, but sub-consciously feel it’s too difficult, then no amount of affirmations will allow you to experience weight reduction. The counter-intention (that it’s too difficult) is too strong!

When you are able to recognize the need for change(s) and feel motivated to experience them, you are at a place where affirmations will be most effective in helping you make the change. The good news is that you can’t really make a mistake, so it’s worth reaching for the experiences (and affirmations) that make your heart sing.

Not motivated, yet? Don’t beat up on yourself.

Procrastinating—or not feeling motivated to take action—is just a sign that your vision and your reality are not quite aligned. Relax and think about what you really want. When you are ready, inspiration and motivation will be effortless, as will be taking the appropriate actions. We’ll be there for you when you are ready to make the Ultimate Commitment.

For those who are ready, click here to download a few PDF pages that will start you on your journey.

Image credit: nruboc

Cultivating Self-Love

In the latest Co=Creation Cafe, Prosperity Coach Joan Sotkin talks about “It’s NOT About the Money: The Inner Work of Lasting Financial
Well-Being”. In her closing comments, she recommends two important things to the listener. One of them is learning to love yourself, and
self-love is what this post will focus upon.
It would be a very long post if I wrote about ALL the things you can do to cultivate self-love, so let me just hit the high points. Feel free to
share any additional ideas or comments below.
Talk to anyone who has spent time on personal growth and they will tell you: At the basis of every problem (health, wealth, relationships, etc.)
is a lack of self-love.  Louise Hay discovered this when she was doing 1:1 consulting. When we take the time to address this one aspect of
our life, we begin to shift everything for the better.
That said, what does it *mean* to love yourself?
Think of how you feel when you love a pet, a child, or a good friend? How do you feel when you see them? What efforts do you take to help
them or make their life more enjoyable? Do you do the same for yourself?
Self-care is one way that we show self-love to ourselves. For example, we can make time for:
• Regular exercise to keep your body-temple functioning at it’s best
• Daily meditation or quiet contemplation
• Eating healthy sit-down meals
• Taking breaks for deep breathing~from your belly, not shallow breathing from your chest
• Getting to sleep at a regular time, and the right amount of sleep for you to be at your best
• Doing something fun every day~laughter is a powerful medicine
• Counting your blessings (on paper or in your mind) every day
There are countless ways to embrace self-care. Share your favorites in the comments below.
We also show ourselves self-love when we are clear about how we will allow others to treat us. Take a look around your world and notice the
people you respect the most. How do they allow others to treat them? Which of those examples feel *good* to you? Are you doing them
already? If not, consider establishing your boundaries and how you will maintain them.
As I have grown my social network, I have come across some really wonderful, enlightened souls. Unfortunately, I have also come across a
few posers: Those who pretend for the world that they are enlightened, even make their living teaching others, then treat people they see as a
threat with incredible disrespect and lack of kindness. I have empathy for these people, because I realize their actions come from their fears
and lack of self-love.
When someone treats me poorly the first time, I forgive and forget. Hey, we’re all human. Bad days happen. Apologies are accepted.
However, if it happens a second time, I am on alert. This shows me that this person may have a pattern of treating others with negatively to
temporarily feel better.
As a coach, I’ve noticed more than one client *picking a fight* with me just as they are at the point of making a huge shift. See, when someone
is fearful of change, it’s sometimes easier to find fault or lay blame on another person than it is to stand in our power, face the fear, and make
the shift. When a client does this, I know they are not ready to make a change. I understand that.
However, when someone calls me their friend and then makes a habit of treating me poorly, it’s time for me to send them love and move on.
Sure, I could spend time explaining why their behavior is unacceptable, but in my experience~if this is truly their pattern~they will just keep
repeating the pattern. It’s not a matter of IF, but a matter of WHEN. If they can mistreat someone 3 times, they can just as easily do it 300 or
300,000 times.
Dr. Phil says, “We teach people how to treat us.” While I am a very understanding and tolerant person, I’ve learned that no one else will teach
others how to treat me with love and respect. Part of cultivating self-love is making the conscious decision to establish our own boundaries
and then maintain them. We can be loving, understanding, even forgiving, without being a doormat for the ongoing bad behaviors of a few.
What this does is send a powerful message to your inner-self:
• I love myself
• I am deserving of love from myself and others
• I care enough to only allow those who are aligned with that love
• I do not accept poor treatment from myself or others
• I surround myself with people who support and appreciate me
• If I encounter those who are unkind, I bless with love and move on
That’s enough for now. It’s your turn: How do you cultivate self-love? Has this post given you ideas for yourself? If so, please share below so
visitors can learn from your wisdom.

In the November 2009  Co=Creation Cafe, Prosperity Coach Joan Sotkin discusses “It’s NOT About the Money: The Inner Work of Lasting Financial Well-Being“. In her closing comments, she recommends two important things to the listener. One of them is learning to love yourself…and self-love is what this post will focus upon.

It would be a very long post if I wrote about ALL the things you can do to cultivate self-love, so let me just hit the high points. Feel free to share any additional ideas or comments below.

Talk to anyone who has spent time on personal growth and they will tell you: At the basis of every problem (health, wealth, relationships, etc.) is a lack of self-love. Louise Hay discovered this when she was doing 1:1 consulting. When we take the time to address this one aspect of our life, we begin to shift everything for the better.

That said, what does it really *mean* to love yourself? How does one cultivate self-love?

Think of how you feel when you love a pet, a child, or a good friend? How do you feel when you see them? What efforts do you take to help them or make their life more enjoyable? Do you extend the same courtesies to yourself? Part of being a Deliberate Creator is to align your vibration with the Divine Source of All-That-Is~the loving energy that is the basis of everything we experience with our multiple-senses.

Self-care is an important way that we exhibit and cultivate self-love. For example, we can make time for:

> Regular exercise to keep your body-temple functioning at it’s best

> Daily meditation or quiet contemplation

> Eating healthy sit-down meals

> Consciously choosing supportive thoughts/beliefs (affirmations, visualizations)

> Taking breaks for deep breathing~from your belly, not shallowly from your chest

> Getting to sleep at a regular time, and the right amount of sleep for you to be at your best

> Doing something fun every day~laughter is a powerful medicine

> Counting your blessings (on paper or in your mind) often and regularly

This is just a short-list. There are countless ways to embrace self-care. If you’d like more information, listen to the February and March 2009 Co=Creation Cafe Calls about Nurturing Your Most Important Relationship (Parts I & II). Have favorites of your own? Be sure to share them in the comments below.

We also show ourselves self-love when we are clear about how we will allow others to treat us. Take a look around your world and notice the people you respect the most. How do they allow others to treat them? Which of those examples feel *good* to you? Are you doing them already? If not, consider establishing your boundaries and deciding how you will maintain them.

As I have grown my social network, I have come across some really wonderful, enlightened souls. Unfortunately, I have also come across a few posers: Those who pretend for the world that they are enlightened, even make their living teaching others, then treat people they see as a threat with incredible disrespect and lack of kindness. I have empathy for these people, because I realize their actions ultimately come from their fears and lack of self-love.

When someone treats me poorly the first time, I forgive and forget. Hey, we’re all human. Bad days happen. Apologies are accepted.

However, if it happens a second time, I am on alert. This shows me that this person may have a pattern of treating others negatively in order to temporarily feel better.

As a coach, I’ve noticed more than one client *picking a fight* with me just as they are at the point of making a huge shift. See, when someone is fearful of change, it’s sometimes easier to find fault or lay blame on another person than it is to stand in our power, face the fear, and make the shift. When a client does this, I know they are not ready to make a change. I understand that. Usually, they are looking for an easy exit, and picking a fight is easier than saying, “I don’t think I’m ready just yet. Can we take a break?”

However, when someone calls me their friend and then makes a habit of treating me poorly, it’s time for me to send them love and move on.

Sure, I could spend time explaining why their behavior is unacceptable, but in my experience they usually don’t want to hear this truth, AND~if this is truly their pattern~they will just keep repeating the pattern. It’s not a matter of IF, but a matter of WHEN. If they can mistreat someone 3 times, they can just as easily do it 300 or 300,000 times.

I don’t quote Dr. Phil often, but I do agree when he says, “We teach people how to treat us.” While I am a very understanding and tolerant person, I’ve learned that no one else (except me) will teach others how to treat me with love and respect. Therefore, part of cultivating self-love is making the conscious decision to establish our own boundaries and then consciously maintain them. We can be loving, understanding, even forgiving, without being a doormat for the ongoing bad behaviors of a few.

When we consciously set boundaries and then maintain them, we send a powerful message to our inner-self:

> I love and respect myself

> I am deserving of love and respect from myself and others

> I care enough to only allow those who are aligned with my own love and respect

> I do not accept poor treatment from myself or others

> I take responsibility for loving, respecting, and protecting myself

> I surround myself with people who love, respect, support and appreciate me

> If I encounter those who are unkind, I bless them with love and move on

That’s enough for now. It’s your turn: How do you cultivate self-love? Has this post given you ideas for yourself? If so, please share below so visitors can learn from your wisdom.

Creating Your Own Economy

If you’re breathing, it’s pretty hard to miss it: Everybody and their brother is talking about the economy. Most are labeling it everything from slow or down, to a recession, and some even consider it the beginning of a depression.

Here’s the thing: Everything is energy, including our economy. In our attraction-based Universe, what we focus upon, we attract energetically. What we focus upon with emotion, we attract even faster energetically. Doesn’t matter what emotion ~ Quantum Physics and heart-based studies show that feeling an emotion boosts the energetic broadcast of your focus across the quantum field of possibilities and brings THAT possibility closer to you much faster than if you thought about it with no emotion.

economySo, when mass-consciousness is focused on something (in this case the economic state), what is being focused upon is being created. If you are worrying and complaining about the economy, you are actually contributing to the current state!

Do the masses who are focusing negatively on the economy really want an economic slowdown, recession, or a depression? I highly doubt it, since their source of focus is usually complaining, blaming, and worrying. They are just unconscious of their true creative powers.

Nevertheless, their incessant attention and their worries lock them in fear which just adds MORE energy to the creation process. If people truly understood their incredible power of creation, I believe they would choose differently. Surely, these folks are not conscious that their attention and energy is adding to such possibilities.

The best way to counteract the mass energy moving toward a non-desired outcome is for those who choose to be Deliberate Creators to consciously focus attention in a desired direction, and tune-out what the less conscious folks are saying about the matter. This is not a time to engage in never-ending conversations about the problems with ‘what is’. Abraham has said (paraphrasing, here) that one conscious person who is tuned into Source Energy is far more powerful than millions who are not.

When it comes down to it, we create our own economy with our vibration (how we interact with the Source Energy around us), our thoughts/attitudes that drive our actions, and the belief in the possibilities. We create our own luck by believing in the possibility of opportunities. What we are willing to perceive is what predominantly shows up in our world. This is why *it seems* as though those who are doing well continue to do so, and those on the edge seem to slip off.

By the way, don’t let the fear-mongers who tell economic horror stories designed to paralyze your efforts fool you: More millionaires were created during The Great Depression than any other time in U.S. History, and this article explains how and why this happened. It boils down to Deliberate Creators believing that something else was possible, focusing attention there, and being aware of all the opportunities available to create their own economic booms. Oh, and if you are letting people talk you out of reaching your dream, then you are not a Deliberate Creator.

Have you made a conscious decision to be a Deliberate Creator, or do you live by default allowing others to decide how you will experience your life?

Here are some steps that conscious, Deliberate Creators can take today to create their own economy:

1. Take responsibility for your own vibration. Pay attention to how you feel and use it as a guide to keep your vibration as high and clear as possible. Meditate regularly so you become attuned and accustomed the higher vibrations. Then, when you begin to feel your vibration slip, you’ll notice it faster and be in a better position to course-correct. Only you are in control of your vibration, as no one else can think and feel for you.

2. In quiet or meditative moments, get clear about the outcomes you would prefer to experience. Knowing clearly what you are aiming for allows you to use your energy most effectively. Not sure what you really want? Deliberately collect more data until you get clear, and you can always define and add further clarity.

3. Find ways to activate the vibration of your desired outcomes: Put yourself in the feeling place of already having what you are seeking such as through visualization, affirmations, creating vision boards or mind-movies, talking about the possibility with other deliberate creators, writing about experiencing your manifestation. Write down & read or say your affirmations regularly. Imagine the perfect clients contacting you again and again. Know what it feels like to be successful and create a profitable economy for yourself.

4. Deliberately seek and connect with other conscious creators. There are *many* of us out here in your real and virtual networks. You can tell who we are by the enthusiasm in our voices and sparkle in our eyes. Those who vibrate much lower find us irritating to be around because we remind them that they have a choice. Begin engaging folks in conversations. If the conversation quickly turns to complaining and blaming failure on the *economy*, then you haven’t found us, yet. Keep believing in the possibility of connecting with other Deliberate Creators.

Good Vibe University is one of the best communities for Deliberate Creators I have seen so far! If your search hasn’t turned up a consistently positive and supportive community, check out GoodVibeU.

5. Get picky about the energy you allow around you. Turn off the news and lo-vibe media. Choose instead to read uplifting books, articles, and blog-posts. Listen to uplifting podcasts. Limit time with low-vibing fault-finders and complainers. Join an uplifting business group such as Quantum MasterMind. Find ways to inspire others and be inspired everyday. Many folks who did this saw their businesses grow exponentially. It’s not a coincidence.

Now it’s your turn:
What do you do to be a conscious, Deliberate Creator of your own economy?

Law of Attwaction (LoA on Twitter)

Twitter amazes me. I’ve said it before: Prior to joining Twitter and tweeting, NO ONE could convince me that it was possible to forge a relationship 140 characters at a time, let alone make a difference in people’s lives. Further, I would never believe it could be such a vehicle for the Law of Attraction to play out. Nor could I imagine how it would let me make a difference in other people’s lives just by being who I am naturally. Yet, everyday, I receive tweets and direct messages thanking me for sharing something that made a huge difference in another person’s life.

Take Melody Campbell (@SmBizGuru) for instance. She observed one of her followers tweeting me on #MaMo (Manifesting Monday, the virtual manifestation circle on Twitter) about a subject that appealed to her. She retweeted that message (sent it again so her followers could read it), asking to be included in the #MaMo process.

I know from teaching|mentoring|coaching my clients that there is no such thing as a one-size-fits-all quick fix. Every client must follow their own path to success. I know that many times people ask for something, but don’t really think they can actually have/create what they are asking for. The lack of belief is the real stumbling block, not what they are asking for! I also know that asking powerful questions can get a client to look a little deeper than they have before, which helps them develop a deeper awareness. Every drop of awareness helps as we grow in consciousness and personal power, which is then reflected in everything we manifest into our lives.

So, when Melody tweeted me, I started by asking her a few questions to help her decide how committed she was to experiencing positive change. Each time I asked a question gave her a chance to go a little deeper. She replied, and we went back and forth a number of times. At one point, she seemed resistant so I teased her a bit about whether she really wanted to know the answer. She insisted she did, and after that really tried to answer the questions honestly.

When I could see she was serious about wanting the answer, I intuited that one of the videos I tweet about often would be of great value to her and sent her the link. Turns out, the information I was providing was completely new to Melody even though I had been tweeting about it for the past 6 months! This was not only all new to her, but with the new awareness from answering my questions, she was now really *ready to hear* the message.

Unbeknownst to me, prior to our intweraction (OK, I just made up that word to describe interaction on Twitter), Melody had been praying for some answers to her deeper questions. So, on that day, she was finally *ready* to hear the answer to her prayers, and that’s when she saw my tweets with one of her followers. I see this as the Universe delivering Melody’s request in the most expedient way. She asked, and when she was ready to receive the answer came to her…while she happened to be on Twitter!

The next day, Melody sent me these two Direct Messages: (read bottom one first)

…and sent me this testimonial:

Thank you for connecting with me on Twitter!

Our encounter was brief, but right on target. Nancy and I connected on Twitter with a few succinct 140 character exchanges. Her comments went right to my heart issue like a magnet to steel. She shared a tiny nugget of truth that has played a very large part in a major breakthrough within 24 hours of our exchange. Nancy is not only knowledgeable but she’s “in-tune”. She was a channel for the answer that I had been praying for. I am blessed to have shared this important exchange with her.

Melody Campbell, Conrad, MontanaNight www.TheSmallBusinessGuru.com

So, by being who I am naturally whilst Twittering, yet another person was able to experience an amazing breakthrough. That’s pretty amazing to me and further proof that not only is the Law of Attwaction *alive and active* on Twitter, but we live in an *amazing Universe* that is constantly seeking ways to deliver what we have to offer…and what we need to receive. Are you ready to hear the message?

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UPDATE: I posted this in the early hours of 6/19, and later that morning logged back onto Twitter just 5 minutes before Melody’s live weekly Get More Business BTR show. Her guest was unable to join the call, and she was asking for folks to call in. I did, so here is the recording of the impromptu show we did entitled, “Law of Attwaction”. Please submit your comments or questions below or at TheSmallBusinessGuru.com.

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Could Coaching Help You?


>
Is there something in your life that you’d like to change but don’t know how to go about it?

> Do you feel stuck and wonder how you can possibly get unstuck?

> Are you needing support and encouragement to move through a phase of your life?

> Have you tried using affirmations before with little or no results for your efforts?

> Do you wish you could create powerful affirmations that bring change?

If you answered yes to any of the above, coaching might just what you are looking for. Coaching is often the fastest, most efficient way to address issues that we cannot address on our own. Imagine quickly receiving the support and guidance to get where you want to go, and discovering the amazing creative power you have within yourself!?!

Affirmation Study
This year, I launched the AffirmingSpirit Affirmation Study to examine and track ways that people get the most out of their affirmations. As part of the process, I provided weekly ‘Affirmation Coaching’ for the first month, followed by monthly check-ins, to support the participants in their process of creating and crafting their own, powerful affirmations. This was the first time we had offered coaching of any kind through this site.

Much to my surprise, study participants unanimously rated the coaching as the main reason they were experiencing success with their affirmations! I began receiving requests from the volunteers and from their peers, for coaching. Several participants asked to have more frequent check-ins, as they realized the coaching was vital to their success. As it turns out, coaching has become a passion for me as I’m able to apply all I’ve learned over the past 23+ years, and I’m enjoying it as much as those who are appreciating their amazing results.

What is Affirmation Coaching?
In the last section, I used the term ‘Affirmation Coaching’ in quotes because it really does not fully explain what I offer. At the beginning, someone may be interested in developing some great affirmations of their own, but in order to succeed they have to first release negative thoughts that have kept them stuck. In that process, depending on their situation, a single coaching client could be discussing life issues, business issues, spiritual issues, or a combination of all 3. Most often, I’ve personally experienced the same block as the client, so I can share first-hand what worked for me and why. This helps them see that they aren’t alone.

In addition, through coaching, I discovered that I am highly intuitive—feeling and sensing precisely the solution that will benefit each person. Since I do not limit you on what you are allowed to desire, the coaching is also unlimited. If you can imagine it, the Universe can provide it to you…as your coach, I will be your guide in that process as an unlimited intuitive resource focused on serving you.

Coaching is Neither Therapy Nor Consulting
Coaching is designed as a support for people who are ready to make changes in their life, but need guidance and encouragement along the way. During the coaching process, I track our conversations, so if it becomes obvious that you really need professional therapy, I will refer you to someone in your local area. If you are currently on prescribed medications for a mental health issue, or are seeing a mental health professional, I recommend that you complete or get stable in that process before working with a coach. That way, you are ensured to get the most from coaching.

Learn More
If you have some goals that you would like to achieve or change you would like to experience, and you are ready to benefit from a different perspective, visit the site for more information about coaching. Once, there, feel free to contact me if you have any questions.

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