Who Needs a Coach When I Have Friends?

Boy, this is a topic I have been meaning to write about for a while!

Whether you have voiced it or not, I am betting a number of you think talking to your friends is just as good as hiring a coach.


I know you think this way, because I used to think this waythat was, until I hired a coach when I was launching AffirmingSpirit.

It’s NOT the same – at least, not when you hire a good coach!

Over the years, several of my clients have been truly surprised to find coaching much more helpful than just speaking to their friends. There’s some good reasons for this.

A FEW IMPORTANT WAYS THAT COACHES DIFFER FROM FRIENDS
You might be friendly with your coach, but your coach has a much different relationship to you than a friend. A coach is your partner in moving forward and their only agenda is your ultimate success. Coaches know how to advocate for your best interest, even if you haven’t been willing to do that for yourself. The same may not always be true of friends.

Regardless of what they say, friends have a vested interest in you staying exactly the same as you are right now. Don’t be surprised if your friends try to talk you out of taking a risk, or pursuing a dream. If you grow, that might throw off the balance in a friendship, so friends, by their nature, are there to support you *where you are* but their agenda is not always in your best interest.

Friends are more likely to agree with you when you complain. While it might feel good momentarily to have someone agreeing with you, it doesn’t help you grow and it keeps you stuck in victimhood. A good coach will hear where you are coming from but also won’t let you get stuck there. They will show you new perspectives,  challenge you to envision something bigger for yourself, and encourage you to use your pain as your fuel in following your dreams!

Coaches will help you go farther than friends alone. You will get open, honest and direct communication from a coach. Your friends might be afraid to tell you what they really think. People who hire coaches are not only more productive, but they also have the encouragement they need along the way. Friends can be encouraging, to a point. After that, you are usually on your own.

Friends get tired of being your sounding board. If your friends are starting to avoid you, or have suddenly become too busy to spend time with you…it might be a hint. Coaches are trained to distance themselves so they can be your best ally. It’s like having your own helicopter guide scoping out the terrain ahead of you en route to your dream and showing you all the best routes.

You might not want to discuss some topics, even with a very close friend. This is especially true if you are starting a business or making a big change in your life. At times like these, the confidential relationship between you and a coach is invaluable! Do you want your friends to know all the issues you struggle with or minute details of the business you are launching? Didn’t think so!

ENJOY FRIENDS, HIRE COACHES
Friends and coaches each have their place, and don’t get me wrong: Friends are great ~ I highly recommend them! I have a whole bunch of them, myself. I just don’t go to them for coaching. That keeps my friendships in a positive place where we can focus on having fun and light encouragement.

Coaching is most often time-limited. When you are done with the coaching process, you may still stay in touch with the coach and might even revisit coaching at a later time, but the coaching relationship ends until you are ready to move forward again. Let’s hope your friendships are not time-limited!

If you think talking to a friend will save you the cost of hiring a coach, consider how you value your friendships. Is it worth losing friends to get some occasional advice that might not serve you in the long run? It’s a much better investment to work with a coach for a set period of time, and leave the coaching out of your friendships.

I’d love to know what you think of this topic. Share your comments below…

BIG HELP for Small Businesses ~ Harnessing Your True Power: What to do BEFORE you take action!

YES! The AMAZING seven segment small business expert call series,
Harnessing Your True Power: What to do BEFORE you take action!Harnessing Your True Power: What to do BEFORE you take action!Launches October 19,  2010 at 12:00am ET!

Sign up now to listen to all 7 calls!

Who Is This Series For?

Small business owners (solopreneurs, freelancers, womenpreneurs) and those who are currently employed who are contemplating self-employment, who have noticed that actions alone are not enough!

What Is This Series About?

This series, featuring 7 experts, has the information that small business owners need now to grow an existing business or jumpstart a new one!

Have you ever wondered why some people are highly successful with every action they take, while others who take the same actions, fail? This call asks each expert to talk in-depth about this phenomenon and provide business owners with real tools, techniques and options for creating success.

Harnessing Your True Power

These call are so fantastic, and the line up of experts is ALL-STAR! You won’t want to miss any of the amazing content that has the power to shift your perspective and your business immediately. Just think: One tip, alone, could make a HUGE difference in your business makes it worth your time to listen. But, to listen to all the calls free online, you have to sign up now!

Where and When?

When you sign up, you are provided all the information to access the calls online. You can then pick the time that is most convenient for you to listen, online, through your browser window.

Seriously, it can’t be any EASIER than that!!!

Why Is This Series Free?

I wanted to get this information out to the most people possible, so I put together this series for free for a limited period of time. Each of the seven calls will be available to those who sign up for just 48 hours. You can listen to the calls ANYTIME during their respective 48 hour windows, IF you signed up.

So, this series is  ONLY free IF you:

1. Sign up for the series When you sign up, you’ll confirm your email address and begin receiving notices of how to access the call postings.

2. Listen to the calls online Each call is posted online for only 48 hours. If you arrive AFTER the 48 hour window, you’ll miss out on listening for free.

3. Starts October 19th and the last call is posted October 28th, removed by October 31st. After that, you will no longer be able to access this powerful content for free.

Share this!

This series is so amazing that you will want to tell everyone you know about it. To share it, go to to the sign up page and click the SHARE button at the top. You can then share this series with everyone you know via email and social media.

Learn more, sign up and share it NOW!

Cultivating Self-Love

In the latest Co=Creation Cafe, Prosperity Coach Joan Sotkin talks about “It’s NOT About the Money: The Inner Work of Lasting Financial
Well-Being”. In her closing comments, she recommends two important things to the listener. One of them is learning to love yourself, and
self-love is what this post will focus upon.
It would be a very long post if I wrote about ALL the things you can do to cultivate self-love, so let me just hit the high points. Feel free to
share any additional ideas or comments below.
Talk to anyone who has spent time on personal growth and they will tell you: At the basis of every problem (health, wealth, relationships, etc.)
is a lack of self-love.  Louise Hay discovered this when she was doing 1:1 consulting. When we take the time to address this one aspect of
our life, we begin to shift everything for the better.
That said, what does it *mean* to love yourself?
Think of how you feel when you love a pet, a child, or a good friend? How do you feel when you see them? What efforts do you take to help
them or make their life more enjoyable? Do you do the same for yourself?
Self-care is one way that we show self-love to ourselves. For example, we can make time for:
• Regular exercise to keep your body-temple functioning at it’s best
• Daily meditation or quiet contemplation
• Eating healthy sit-down meals
• Taking breaks for deep breathing~from your belly, not shallow breathing from your chest
• Getting to sleep at a regular time, and the right amount of sleep for you to be at your best
• Doing something fun every day~laughter is a powerful medicine
• Counting your blessings (on paper or in your mind) every day
There are countless ways to embrace self-care. Share your favorites in the comments below.
We also show ourselves self-love when we are clear about how we will allow others to treat us. Take a look around your world and notice the
people you respect the most. How do they allow others to treat them? Which of those examples feel *good* to you? Are you doing them
already? If not, consider establishing your boundaries and how you will maintain them.
As I have grown my social network, I have come across some really wonderful, enlightened souls. Unfortunately, I have also come across a
few posers: Those who pretend for the world that they are enlightened, even make their living teaching others, then treat people they see as a
threat with incredible disrespect and lack of kindness. I have empathy for these people, because I realize their actions come from their fears
and lack of self-love.
When someone treats me poorly the first time, I forgive and forget. Hey, we’re all human. Bad days happen. Apologies are accepted.
However, if it happens a second time, I am on alert. This shows me that this person may have a pattern of treating others with negatively to
temporarily feel better.
As a coach, I’ve noticed more than one client *picking a fight* with me just as they are at the point of making a huge shift. See, when someone
is fearful of change, it’s sometimes easier to find fault or lay blame on another person than it is to stand in our power, face the fear, and make
the shift. When a client does this, I know they are not ready to make a change. I understand that.
However, when someone calls me their friend and then makes a habit of treating me poorly, it’s time for me to send them love and move on.
Sure, I could spend time explaining why their behavior is unacceptable, but in my experience~if this is truly their pattern~they will just keep
repeating the pattern. It’s not a matter of IF, but a matter of WHEN. If they can mistreat someone 3 times, they can just as easily do it 300 or
300,000 times.
Dr. Phil says, “We teach people how to treat us.” While I am a very understanding and tolerant person, I’ve learned that no one else will teach
others how to treat me with love and respect. Part of cultivating self-love is making the conscious decision to establish our own boundaries
and then maintain them. We can be loving, understanding, even forgiving, without being a doormat for the ongoing bad behaviors of a few.
What this does is send a powerful message to your inner-self:
• I love myself
• I am deserving of love from myself and others
• I care enough to only allow those who are aligned with that love
• I do not accept poor treatment from myself or others
• I surround myself with people who support and appreciate me
• If I encounter those who are unkind, I bless with love and move on
That’s enough for now. It’s your turn: How do you cultivate self-love? Has this post given you ideas for yourself? If so, please share below so
visitors can learn from your wisdom.

In the November 2009  Co=Creation Cafe, Prosperity Coach Joan Sotkin discusses “It’s NOT About the Money: The Inner Work of Lasting Financial Well-Being“. In her closing comments, she recommends two important things to the listener. One of them is learning to love yourself…and self-love is what this post will focus upon.

It would be a very long post if I wrote about ALL the things you can do to cultivate self-love, so let me just hit the high points. Feel free to share any additional ideas or comments below.

Talk to anyone who has spent time on personal growth and they will tell you: At the basis of every problem (health, wealth, relationships, etc.) is a lack of self-love. Louise Hay discovered this when she was doing 1:1 consulting. When we take the time to address this one aspect of our life, we begin to shift everything for the better.

That said, what does it really *mean* to love yourself? How does one cultivate self-love?

Think of how you feel when you love a pet, a child, or a good friend? How do you feel when you see them? What efforts do you take to help them or make their life more enjoyable? Do you extend the same courtesies to yourself? Part of being a Deliberate Creator is to align your vibration with the Divine Source of All-That-Is~the loving energy that is the basis of everything we experience with our multiple-senses.

Self-care is an important way that we exhibit and cultivate self-love. For example, we can make time for:

> Regular exercise to keep your body-temple functioning at it’s best

> Daily meditation or quiet contemplation

> Eating healthy sit-down meals

> Consciously choosing supportive thoughts/beliefs (affirmations, visualizations)

> Taking breaks for deep breathing~from your belly, not shallowly from your chest

> Getting to sleep at a regular time, and the right amount of sleep for you to be at your best

> Doing something fun every day~laughter is a powerful medicine

> Counting your blessings (on paper or in your mind) often and regularly

This is just a short-list. There are countless ways to embrace self-care. If you’d like more information, listen to the February and March 2009 Co=Creation Cafe Calls about Nurturing Your Most Important Relationship (Parts I & II). Have favorites of your own? Be sure to share them in the comments below.

We also show ourselves self-love when we are clear about how we will allow others to treat us. Take a look around your world and notice the people you respect the most. How do they allow others to treat them? Which of those examples feel *good* to you? Are you doing them already? If not, consider establishing your boundaries and deciding how you will maintain them.

As I have grown my social network, I have come across some really wonderful, enlightened souls. Unfortunately, I have also come across a few posers: Those who pretend for the world that they are enlightened, even make their living teaching others, then treat people they see as a threat with incredible disrespect and lack of kindness. I have empathy for these people, because I realize their actions ultimately come from their fears and lack of self-love.

When someone treats me poorly the first time, I forgive and forget. Hey, we’re all human. Bad days happen. Apologies are accepted.

However, if it happens a second time, I am on alert. This shows me that this person may have a pattern of treating others negatively in order to temporarily feel better.

As a coach, I’ve noticed more than one client *picking a fight* with me just as they are at the point of making a huge shift. See, when someone is fearful of change, it’s sometimes easier to find fault or lay blame on another person than it is to stand in our power, face the fear, and make the shift. When a client does this, I know they are not ready to make a change. I understand that. Usually, they are looking for an easy exit, and picking a fight is easier than saying, “I don’t think I’m ready just yet. Can we take a break?”

However, when someone calls me their friend and then makes a habit of treating me poorly, it’s time for me to send them love and move on.

Sure, I could spend time explaining why their behavior is unacceptable, but in my experience they usually don’t want to hear this truth, AND~if this is truly their pattern~they will just keep repeating the pattern. It’s not a matter of IF, but a matter of WHEN. If they can mistreat someone 3 times, they can just as easily do it 300 or 300,000 times.

I don’t quote Dr. Phil often, but I do agree when he says, “We teach people how to treat us.” While I am a very understanding and tolerant person, I’ve learned that no one else (except me) will teach others how to treat me with love and respect. Therefore, part of cultivating self-love is making the conscious decision to establish our own boundaries and then consciously maintain them. We can be loving, understanding, even forgiving, without being a doormat for the ongoing bad behaviors of a few.

When we consciously set boundaries and then maintain them, we send a powerful message to our inner-self:

> I love and respect myself

> I am deserving of love and respect from myself and others

> I care enough to only allow those who are aligned with my own love and respect

> I do not accept poor treatment from myself or others

> I take responsibility for loving, respecting, and protecting myself

> I surround myself with people who love, respect, support and appreciate me

> If I encounter those who are unkind, I bless them with love and move on

That’s enough for now. It’s your turn: How do you cultivate self-love? Has this post given you ideas for yourself? If so, please share below so visitors can learn from your wisdom.

Intuition and Inspired Action: Your Greatest Business Resources

Intuition is that quiet voice inside of you that shows you the best direction for you. Everyone receives their intuition in different ways and places in their body. I receive my intuition in my mind as a thought or picture coupled with a feeling in my lower throat/upper chest area. When I pay attention to it, there is a feeling of ‘yes, that’s right”–a *knowing* that this is the right action for me. Do you know where you receive your intuitive guidance?

Regardless of your religious or spiritual background, it cannot be denied that intuitive guidance carries with it a deeper wisdom and powerful energy. Often what you receive feels right to you, but very *off* or strange to others. I’ve come to realize this is because the guidance is meant specifically for us”not for anyone around us. There is no use asking others whether our intuitive guidance is right or not. Bottom line: If it *feels right* to us, then *it is right* for us and meant for us to follow. If you are in doubt, then it doesn’t feel right and probably isn’t intuition.

When you listen to and act on your intuition, that is what is known as *Inspired Action*. This type of action comes with it’s own surge of energy, and following it brings far greater results with less effort than uninspired action. In comparison, any other type of action is, essentially, busy work. No other human can give you or take away what intuition provides. Make a habit of only taking inspired action, and you’ll be amazed how much easier it is to grow your business and succeed!

By default, following intuitive guidance feels really good. When you are giving your attention to thoughts and actions that feel good, the Law of Attraction mirrors back to you what you are focusing upon”in this case, more experiences and opportunities that feel good!

Last year, I had the privilege of coaching a gal whose small business was not doing as well as she had been hoping. She loved the work and enjoyed working with the few clients she had at the time. On the surface, she seemed to be taking all the appropriate actions to grow her business. She had a detailed business plan and was executing her marketing plan like a pro…but nothing was working. At the point where I was speaking to her, she was considering closing her business and feeling very conflicted about the idea.

In talking to her initially, she speculated it was the area of the country she lived in or just the *economy* that was preventing her from growing her business. All the reasons she had for the business not working were external, intuitively I could feel there was much more going on internally that needed to be discussed. I know that external conditions rarely have an affect on a situation unless you internally give them the power to do so.

It turned out that a well-meaning relative with an MBA was constantly criticizing every area of her business and this triggered her to second-guess her business decisions. She never gave herself a chance to follow-through on her ideas. This relative would convince her to abort her plans and only follow their suggestions, which didn’t feel right to her at all. My client was giving more attention to her relative’s opinions than to her own intuition. No wonder her business was floundering!

So, I explained to her the way our intuition works, helped her discover how hers showed up, and encouraged her to follow that guidance before she followed anyone else’s suggestions. The shift was almost immediate! Within a week, she regained enthusiasm for her business, was re-energized, got clear on what she really wanted and took inspired actions. When the relative would chime in, she’d say, “thanks, I’ll think about it…” then refocus her attention on what felt best to her. Eventually, that relative stopped giving unwanted business advice.

A year later, you would not recognize her business! She’s dropped services that she didn’t enjoy providing, she’s changed her website and refocused her offerings in the direction that thrills her. Her business has grown exponentially, AND…most importantly, I think, she’s loving every bit of that business expansion.

When you give your intuition your undivided attention, follow what feels right to you and only take inspired action in your business, you turbo-charge your business for success!

How do you use your intuition and inspired action as business resources?

Law of Attwaction (LoA on Twitter)

Twitter amazes me. I’ve said it before: Prior to joining Twitter and tweeting, NO ONE could convince me that it was possible to forge a relationship 140 characters at a time, let alone make a difference in people’s lives. Further, I would never believe it could be such a vehicle for the Law of Attraction to play out. Nor could I imagine how it would let me make a difference in other people’s lives just by being who I am naturally. Yet, everyday, I receive tweets and direct messages thanking me for sharing something that made a huge difference in another person’s life.

Take Melody Campbell (@SmBizGuru) for instance. She observed one of her followers tweeting me on #MaMo (Manifesting Monday, the virtual manifestation circle on Twitter) about a subject that appealed to her. She retweeted that message (sent it again so her followers could read it), asking to be included in the #MaMo process.

I know from teaching|mentoring|coaching my clients that there is no such thing as a one-size-fits-all quick fix. Every client must follow their own path to success. I know that many times people ask for something, but don’t really think they can actually have/create what they are asking for. The lack of belief is the real stumbling block, not what they are asking for! I also know that asking powerful questions can get a client to look a little deeper than they have before, which helps them develop a deeper awareness. Every drop of awareness helps as we grow in consciousness and personal power, which is then reflected in everything we manifest into our lives.

So, when Melody tweeted me, I started by asking her a few questions to help her decide how committed she was to experiencing positive change. Each time I asked a question gave her a chance to go a little deeper. She replied, and we went back and forth a number of times. At one point, she seemed resistant so I teased her a bit about whether she really wanted to know the answer. She insisted she did, and after that really tried to answer the questions honestly.

When I could see she was serious about wanting the answer, I intuited that one of the videos I tweet about often would be of great value to her and sent her the link. Turns out, the information I was providing was completely new to Melody even though I had been tweeting about it for the past 6 months! This was not only all new to her, but with the new awareness from answering my questions, she was now really *ready to hear* the message.

Unbeknownst to me, prior to our intweraction (OK, I just made up that word to describe interaction on Twitter), Melody had been praying for some answers to her deeper questions. So, on that day, she was finally *ready* to hear the answer to her prayers, and that’s when she saw my tweets with one of her followers. I see this as the Universe delivering Melody’s request in the most expedient way. She asked, and when she was ready to receive the answer came to her…while she happened to be on Twitter!

The next day, Melody sent me these two Direct Messages: (read bottom one first)

…and sent me this testimonial:

Thank you for connecting with me on Twitter!

Our encounter was brief, but right on target. Nancy and I connected on Twitter with a few succinct 140 character exchanges. Her comments went right to my heart issue like a magnet to steel. She shared a tiny nugget of truth that has played a very large part in a major breakthrough within 24 hours of our exchange. Nancy is not only knowledgeable but she’s “in-tune”. She was a channel for the answer that I had been praying for. I am blessed to have shared this important exchange with her.

Melody Campbell, Conrad, MontanaNight www.TheSmallBusinessGuru.com

So, by being who I am naturally whilst Twittering, yet another person was able to experience an amazing breakthrough. That’s pretty amazing to me and further proof that not only is the Law of Attwaction *alive and active* on Twitter, but we live in an *amazing Universe* that is constantly seeking ways to deliver what we have to offer…and what we need to receive. Are you ready to hear the message?

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UPDATE: I posted this in the early hours of 6/19, and later that morning logged back onto Twitter just 5 minutes before Melody’s live weekly Get More Business BTR show. Her guest was unable to join the call, and she was asking for folks to call in. I did, so here is the recording of the impromptu show we did entitled, “Law of Attwaction”. Please submit your comments or questions below or at TheSmallBusinessGuru.com.

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The Value is in the Mirror

Coaches are trained that the client knows everything. Seriously. We’re taught that only *you* have the answers to solve your own problems. So, if you already have your own answers, how is a coach of any value?

The value is in the mirror: one of life’s major ironies is that hardly anyone alive can *see* what’s truly blocking them. OK, *maybe* the Dali Lama and *possibly* the Pope. The rest of us need others to help us see what is standing in our way. Gregg Braden described it this way: When riding on a bus to see the great reflecting Buddha, he was able to see the reflection of the Buddha in the still lake before he was able to actually see the statue itself. Life is like that if you are paying very close attention: you’ll see your blocks reflected by those around you.

Most people don’t want to know that other’s problems have anything to do with their own. They feel as if they have enough of their own problems. They miss the point that the problems they have ARE the ones reflected in those around them.

Is there a faster, more expedient way to see those blocks, process their release, and get support moving forward with new energy? Yes. It’s called Life or Business Coaching, which differs from Counseling in that it’s future-focused, only delving into the past so that blocks can be revealed, then it resumes being future-focused. Working with a life or business coach will help you gain clarity, define your focus, release blocks to receiving, and stay on course. Coaches are partners in your success who help you see your own thinking in a way that shows you what is working and what is not working.

Coaching is so important to personal and professional growth that fellow coach, and soon-to-be Counselor, Melissa Quiter and I devoted one entire Co=Creation Cafe call to the discussion: What is coaching? How can it help you? How do you find the best coach for your needs?

You can listen to this Co=Creation Cafe call online or download the MP3 file.

For me, personally, there have been major AHAs and breakthroughs in coaching that I simply wouldn’t have experienced had I been slugging it out on my own. These blocks were in my blind-spot, so I may never have found them if it hadn’t been for working with my coach.

Have you benefitted from Coaching? Please take a moment to share how coaching was beneficial for you.

Getting the Help You Need: A Process for Managing Your Life

In Part II of the book, Ask and It is Given, by NY Times Best-selling authors Esther and Jerry Hicks, there is a section devoted to Abraham’s 22 processes for improving your (vibrational) point of attraction. The Law of Attraction says that which is like unto itself is drawn (like vibrations attract one another).

Askand It Is Given Book coverLet me also point out…there is no religious requirement in order for these techniques to work. Despite the look of the book’s cover, it does not advocate one religion over the other. Personally, I am spiritual, not religious. There are as many good attributes about the world’s religions as there are negative attributes. I choose to cut out the middlemen, but you can do what feels best for you.

I prefer not to recommend something without finding that it works and is worthwhile for others. Long before I started coaching, I read this book and started testing the processes for myself. Every single one of them work exactly as Abraham explained they would, and in most cases, much better! The rarity of every process working is a miracle in itself, but the processes are so effective that I now teach many of them to others.

One of those is Process #10: The Place Mat Process. The story behind this process is that Esther, the channel for the entities known as Abraham, was sitting in a restaurant one day feeling overwhelmed by all the items on her to-do list. In desperation, she asked, “Abraham, what should I do?”

Abraham guided her to turn over her place mat, and draw a line down the middle. On the left side, she was guided to write just the items she knew she could accomplish that day. On the right side, she was guided to write down anything she had no idea how to start/accomplish or needed help to complete. She was told the items on the left were Esther’s responsibility, and those on the right would be handled by the Universe. When I first read this, I thought, “Huh? The Universe is going to help me out?” That’s right. Help it does…the book wasn’t kidding: Ask and it IS given.

Using this place mat process for almost 18 months, I have been amazed at how many times everything on the right side is resolved within the day…while I’m still working on my list on the left!

I’m not the only one who has had that experience, either. Many of the people I coach have struggled with overwhelm and anxiety over their workload, so I teach them this process and every single one of them have told me…This is incredible! Now I use it every day…The stuff on the right is always getting done! I can’t believe how fast it works! I know…don’t ya just LOVE IT! Those that were feeling stressed found this process to be exactly what they needed to feel relief.

Don’t believe me, or the thousands of people who have read the book and found the processes work. Try it for yourself! Take a piece of paper, hold it horizontal, put a line down the middle and begin making your lists as noted above. When you first start out, the list on the right side is pretty big, but you only need to list it once…and it will be completed or become a moot point. Over time, you’ll find that list on the right gets smaller. The Universe does hear us, and answer our requests—every time. Most people don’t bother asking.

What about you? Do you complain about all that’s on your plate? If so, have you tried this process for yourself? Share your experiences in the comment area below.

Best Seat in the House!

A few weeks ago, I attended an outdoor event that my son was participating in. It turned out to be a very hot/not-a-cloud-in-the-sky day. I had anticipated this event, and had used my imagination to define what I wanted to experience in advance. As I wanted the best seat with optimal view, I asked my son what part of the stage he would be on, and did my visualizations from that vantage point. Unfortunately, I had not anticipated theintense heat and lack of shade. Most of the elderly in the audience had umbrellas for shade and the colorful nylon sea all around made me wonder how I would “see” the stage. Fortunately, I was able to buy some bottled water and stay hydrated.

I made arrangements to get to the location about 1.5 hours before, thinking that would be ample time, and found that all the seats in the area where I was planning to sit were already reserved by others. While this did have me wondering about all the advanced visualizations I had done, I know by now… that having done those visualizations meant I would find the best seat.

So, I went from row to row asking if seats were available. Finally, I found a row where there were some seats toward the middle of the row. I sat in a seat at the center of the row so that a larger group could sit to the left of me.

About 10 minutes later, a family came and sat in the open seats on my left. The eldest member of the family was an obese man who sat right next to me. This wouldn’t have been a problem except that the seats were so close…and it was SO HOT! This man overflowed his own chair and was essentially sitting in mine. With his hot, sticky body stuck up against my left side, I quickly began to feel the heat even more.

As soon as I recognized that I was not appreciating the experience, I knew I had better change my attitude and focus on what I DID want…not on what I was experiencing, because I didn’t want that! After all, this is what I coach clients about all the time: Take your attention off what you don’t want, no matter how hard that is, and focus on what you do want…even if that seems impossible in the moment.

The family to the right of me still had reserved seats, and no one was sitting to the right of me. I used that feeling of empty space to help me visualize no one sitting to the left of me, either. I had no idea how to accomplish this, of course, but I know that the Law of Attraction doesn’t require you to know how to accomplish what you want. Just decide what you want and focus on that.

So, I got very clear that I desired…

…no one sitting to the left of me…

…gentle breeze blowing to cool me down…

…and an unobstructed view of the stage.

I visualized that. Imagined that. Ahhh…that’s nice! My mind wandered. I gently brought it back to the visualization, and focused on the feeling of relief. My mind wandered again. Just like with meditation, I just gently brought myself back to the visualization and feeling. I never said a word to anyone around me. My thoughts were focused on my own visualization meditation, and when it wandered, I gently brought it back.

After about 10 minutes of this, the man stuck up….I mean, sitting…next to me brought out a large golf umbrella. You know, the kind with the 4 foot diameter and 2-3″ spokes sticking out beyond the umbrella? When he got it open, he dropped it down behind his shoulders and hits me in the face/shoulder. I was more than a bit surprised, as this happened while I was in the middle of this visualization meditation.

I sputtered,”Uhm, sir, you are hitting me in the face with your umbrella.”

Without saying a word to me, he got up, moved one seat to his left and sat back down! In that moment, I not only had the seats on either side of me open (just as I had visualized), but I began to feel a soft cooling breeze coming up behind me! I smiled to myself. It’s working, I thought and feeling grateful, I kept visualizing a clear view to the stage.

A few minutes later, a woman came to the stage and asked everyone to put their umbrellas away. The audience groaned. She said, “I know, but if you don’t put your umbrellas down, the people behind you will not be able to see the stage. So, I understand it is hot and there is no shade, but please be considerate of those sitting behind you.”

Less than 15 minutes after I had started, and without saying a word or complaining to anyone, my experience changed right before my eyes.

The best part?!? When my son got to the stage and sat down, he was literally straight in front of where I was sitting! Turns out, my son had given me incorrect information about his location on the stage, but Source Energy knew exactly where to sit me! If I had sat in the area I thought I originally wanted, it would have been too far away. I had the best seat in the house: no obstructions beside or in front of me, a gentle breeze blowing, and an unobstructed view of my son. What more could a mother want?

Have stories about overlooking *WHAT IS* in order to create what you *PREFERRED*? Now it’s your turn to share it below…

Keys to Effective Affirmations

AffirmingSpirit Blank Affirmation CardsMost people hear about affirmations in a book, usually where a few generic examples are sited or recommended. They say these generic affirmations for a day or two, find them boring because they are so generic and don’t apply to their life, and eventually give up. Based on this misguided experience, some people actually conclude that affirmations don’t work, and give up on them permanently.

Effective affirmations need to be more than just positive and in the present tense. They need to evoke an emotion in you when you say them, because it’s actually the positive emotional shift in you coupled with the meaning of the words that makes affirmations so powerful!

So, how do you get affirmations to evoke a feeling in you? By connecting what you really are passionate about, what you really desire, with the words you are speaking. One of the best ways I know to do that is with the no cost eCourse I developed entitled Six Steps to Powerful Affirmations.

When you download this no-cost eCourse, you will receive a PDF file that will walk you through the process of discovering your emotional connection to your desires, and in some cases your negative blocks that prevent you from achieving what you want. I have also provided 2 audio files to inspire you further.

One student who followed the course had this to say…

“I just completed step 6 and I wanted to let you know I think this was great! Absolutely GREAT! It made me see just how many negative emotions I associate with things I want to do. I would say it was about 90%. I would have never known this information without going through your 6 step course. I want to say THANK YOU for letting me see myself. You are a godsend.”

F. O., Saratoga, CA

Try it and see what you discover from Six Steps to Powerful Affirmations. Afterward, share your experience in the comments below.

Could Coaching Help You?


>
Is there something in your life that you’d like to change but don’t know how to go about it?

> Do you feel stuck and wonder how you can possibly get unstuck?

> Are you needing support and encouragement to move through a phase of your life?

> Have you tried using affirmations before with little or no results for your efforts?

> Do you wish you could create powerful affirmations that bring change?

If you answered yes to any of the above, coaching might just what you are looking for. Coaching is often the fastest, most efficient way to address issues that we cannot address on our own. Imagine quickly receiving the support and guidance to get where you want to go, and discovering the amazing creative power you have within yourself!?!

Affirmation Study
This year, I launched the AffirmingSpirit Affirmation Study to examine and track ways that people get the most out of their affirmations. As part of the process, I provided weekly ‘Affirmation Coaching’ for the first month, followed by monthly check-ins, to support the participants in their process of creating and crafting their own, powerful affirmations. This was the first time we had offered coaching of any kind through this site.

Much to my surprise, study participants unanimously rated the coaching as the main reason they were experiencing success with their affirmations! I began receiving requests from the volunteers and from their peers, for coaching. Several participants asked to have more frequent check-ins, as they realized the coaching was vital to their success. As it turns out, coaching has become a passion for me as I’m able to apply all I’ve learned over the past 23+ years, and I’m enjoying it as much as those who are appreciating their amazing results.

What is Affirmation Coaching?
In the last section, I used the term ‘Affirmation Coaching’ in quotes because it really does not fully explain what I offer. At the beginning, someone may be interested in developing some great affirmations of their own, but in order to succeed they have to first release negative thoughts that have kept them stuck. In that process, depending on their situation, a single coaching client could be discussing life issues, business issues, spiritual issues, or a combination of all 3. Most often, I’ve personally experienced the same block as the client, so I can share first-hand what worked for me and why. This helps them see that they aren’t alone.

In addition, through coaching, I discovered that I am highly intuitive—feeling and sensing precisely the solution that will benefit each person. Since I do not limit you on what you are allowed to desire, the coaching is also unlimited. If you can imagine it, the Universe can provide it to you…as your coach, I will be your guide in that process as an unlimited intuitive resource focused on serving you.

Coaching is Neither Therapy Nor Consulting
Coaching is designed as a support for people who are ready to make changes in their life, but need guidance and encouragement along the way. During the coaching process, I track our conversations, so if it becomes obvious that you really need professional therapy, I will refer you to someone in your local area. If you are currently on prescribed medications for a mental health issue, or are seeing a mental health professional, I recommend that you complete or get stable in that process before working with a coach. That way, you are ensured to get the most from coaching.

Learn More
If you have some goals that you would like to achieve or change you would like to experience, and you are ready to benefit from a different perspective, visit the site for more information about coaching. Once, there, feel free to contact me if you have any questions.

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