Marisa Peer Can Teach Your Mind to Believe

Marisa PeerIf you’ve been struggling with your business success for a while, there may be unconscious ways in which you are blocking your success. A few months ago, I stumbled across Marisa Peer’s 2015 talk at MindValley’s Belief Hacking Event in Costa Rica. Marisa is an internationally known and respected Hypnotherapist who helps people develop positive beliefs and improve their life experiences. After watching the video and following along with the exercise, I immediately was impressed by what she shared and knew it could help many people.

Shortly after sharing the post on my AffirmingSpirit Facebook page and at Good Vibe University, I began receiving numerous comments and emails thanking me, sharing the AHAs each person had experienced. This particular video hits the nail on the head for many people who have felt like ‘no matter what they do, it’s not working’. They have been in their own way for a long time, but don’t see it.

Marisa Peer: How to Teach Your Mind That Everything is Available to You

Take a moment to watch this powerful video and follow along with the short guided exercise that will help you teach your mind that everything is available to you…

As children, we often received messages of lack, struggle, difficulty, and ‘not enough’ from our care givers. Some of us were constantly told, “no, you can’t have what you want.” It may have seemed that we never could have what we wanted or asked for from our guardians. No question, the care givers in our lives were doing the best they could with what they had.

As adults, other than extreme cases of abuse, we might look back on our experiences with compassion and understand what our ill- informed guardians were trying to do—and how they thought they were preparing us for the “Real World”. But as children, we often internalized those experiences to mean that there’s not enough, we’re not enough, we’re not capable of having what we desire, and that what we desire is not only out-of-reach…but not even available to us.

You Are Supported!

Marisa Peer makes it clear in this video that the Universe that created you, and gave you all of your amazing talents, will support you in EVERYTHING—everything that you want.

You are fully supported in your success and well-being. Author Chellie Campbell calls the Universe is a “Big Yes Machine”—happy to give you the essence of whatever you request. However, if your mind does not know this, and your thoughts / words / actions do not support this understanding, that split energy could be holding you back.

Not feeling supported, and not feeling enough—capable enough, talented enough, knowledgeable enough, resourceful enough, strong enough, smart enough, etc.—is at the heart of a lot of business (and life) dysfunction.

When your mind, body, and spirit feels supported and ‘enough’, there is a sense of inner peace, calm, and relaxation that replaces the constant need to fill the void. If you followed along with the guided exercise in the video and recognize yourself in Maria’s talk, you might want to begin affirming your support and enough-ness.

Below are three short generic affirmations inspired by Marisa’s talk which you can begin saying to yourself when you wake up, throughout your day, and as you fall asleep at night.

By regularly repeating (saying and writing) these affirmations, you will flood your mind and spirit with the realization that the Universe is supporting you, everything you want is available to you right this moment, and you are always ‘enough’.

Any affirmation, but especially generic affirmations like these, are most effective when we’re relaxed and not contradicting the affirmations. So, make sure you are breathing deeply and slowly, and feeling no tension in your body when you repeat these affirmations to yourself. When you say them, notice how your body feels when you know the truth of these powerful statements.

What did you think of Marisa shares in this video, and the guided exercise? I’d love for you to share your AHAs and thoughts below in the comments.

Image credit: mindvalley and Barry-Jansson & Associates

The Incredible Power of Decision

decision

[This article about the power of decision first appeared on AffirmingSpirit.com. It has been revised and updated for the enjoyment of blog-readers.]

The Law of Attraction is part of my daily life now, and applying the techniques has become second-nature to me. Not only am I experiencing great results, I have discovered deeper elements to experiencing success. None is more telling, more potent or more closely tied to success than the incredible power of decision.

Decisions: Left Brain or Right Brain?

Decision is normally thought of as a left-brain thought process, a logical activity devoid of emotion that functions from analyzing data and making a choice. However, I’ve discovered that decisions have a hidden emotional element, that when ignored leads to disastrous results.

Furthermore, when one choice feels better, it is divine guidance, if you will, to move in a certain direction. Ignoring that emotional guidance is usually what creates most human drama. We want to do one thing because it feels better, but we convince ourselves we can’t have what we want (pick your reason, it doesn’t matter) and decide not to follow the course that feels best.

Instead, we slug forward with a decision that feels awful and brings even worse results. That push-pull sets up the drama and the heartache. Without doubt, that is the fastest recipe for failure and a miserable life.

Many people decide, before even trying, that they cannot afford (financially, emotionally, physically, or spiritually) to take a certain action and, in that decision, they squash any possibility for success before they’ve even started. They spend the rest of their life wondering “what if” and playing the push-pull scenario over and over in their heads.

Emotions and Decisions

Decisions, like other thoughts, are made of energy frequencies that include emotional energy. The level of emotion for each decision is based on how connected we are to the expected outcome.

For instance, the decision to use your life savings to start a business might have a relatively high emotion-to-outcome factor, compared to deciding what to have for breakfast or where to park our car.

However, that same decision regarding your life savings might have a lower emotion-to-outcome factor if you have a supportive partner who is making plenty of money to cover monthly expenses for the foreseeable future.

Quantum physics has shown us that everything around us is made up of possibilities and probabilities of conscious always-in-motion Source Energy. Thoughts and emotions are made of this same conscious Source Energy, moving through all matter and across all space and time.

In the decision-making process, when we take a moment to connect to our inner guidance, Source Energy, with practice we can clearly tell which ideas feel best. Which possibilities feel best.

While women are often raised to acknowledge and use their intuition regularly, men still use theirs but interpret it more as a gut feeling. There’s nothing woo-woo about it—the body’s compass is giving us feedback on our thoughts all the time.

As we take notice of the better feeling thoughts, and move toward them, we become even more attuned to better feeling thoughts. Results of our actions reflect the energy with which those actions were taken.

Honing this gift of guidance, turning to it for every decision, the guidance develops into intuition you can always trust. Those who have been deemed visionaries invariably follow their gut feeling, even when everyone else around them are telling them to do something else!

Guidance from Source Energy is unique to each individual, so what feels good to one person—the one meant to take the related action—usually does not feel good to those who are not called to take action. This is why it makes no sense to ask others what they think/feel about guidance you’ve received.

Using our power to decide, in itself, releases stuck energy and sets up powerful momentum. Rather than being stuck in the quagmire of competing options and doubts, making a conscious and clear decision has within it the power to move us forward toward our goal. We’re essentially fine-tuning the signal we’re sending to the multiverses.

Life…A Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

Norman Vincent Peale always said that life is a self-fulfilling prophecy, meaning that life gives you what you believe it will give you. This means you are always right. If you believe you will succeed in life, you are right. If you believe you’ll fail in life, you are right. If you believe people are trying to hurt you, they will. If you believe people are conspiring to help you, they will.

The Law of Attraction set us up to experience what we believe, what we expect, by delivering experiences of equal vibration to our dominant thoughts. If you think you need to be college-educated to succeed, but can’t afford to be college-educated, then by default of the first decision you have already decided that you cannot succeed. Until you decide that the first thought no longer serves you, and create a new thought to operate from, you will remain stuck in a can’t-succeed cycle.

The good news…you can always change your thoughts! It’s never too late to decide to incorporate thoughts that serve you. Whether you choose to use affirmations alone or use a combination of affirmations with other techniques,

When you truly decide, you get clear in your intention, and when combined with positive emotion that clarity brings swift results. With clarity aligned with joy and enthusiasm, Source Energy is now activated to assist you in receiving what you’ve asked for.

You are then positioned to take action that feels more like play than work. You’ll stay with the process longer and more enthusiastically because the journey feels so good. So, not only is the decision clear, but the action that follows is also full of positive energy. What an unbeatable combination!

Don’t worry if you don’t know which steps to take next, after the decision. The decision itself, with enhanced clarity, will start to reveal the next steps. But nothing happens, until a decision is made.

Make a Decision Today

Ask yourself…

Am I living the life I want to live?

Am I experiencing joy and enthusiasm on a regular basis?

If not, make a decision today that the next time you are faced with any decision, you will make a conscious effort to choose the option that feels best to you.

Decide you live in a benevolent universe that is always supporting your choices.

Decide that Source Energy is providing the good feeling as a way to guide you to the best action for you.

Decide that you will live the life you really want to live!

With the momentum of each decision, opportunities will begin showing up to support you. Don’t take my word for it. Give it a try!

If you’ve already experienced the power of decision, share your decision AHAs below in the comments…

Image credit: hkeita

Believing in the Power of Possibilities

possibilities [This article was previously published on AffirmingSpirit.com. It has been revised and updated for the enjoyment of blog-readers.]

Possibilities for Improvement

Whenever someone wants to create change in their life, whether it be to their body, their home, their relationships, their career, their income, or all of the above, they first have to be able to develop a positive concept of “what is possible”. It is from that place of positive possibilities that they can determine what the next steps will be, for otherwise they would not know where to start.

What IS Possible?

The answer to that question depends entirely on who you ask! What’s interesting about ‘what is possible?’ is that the answer is not a one-size-fits-all solution as some experts would claim. It is really a range of answers, a realm if you will, from the easiest to more difficult, from the very small to the grandest of grand to that which has never been considered…and the answer is constantly changing as the universe evolves!

Every person’s realm of possibility is the unique intersection between what they have heard others accomplishing and what they can currently imagine is possible in their minds.

Why is this so important? People act on what they believe is possible for them. If they don’t believe they can do better, they rarely try. Plus, each person is going to have a realm of possibility that is slightly different from others, pre-set by what they learned was possible in their youth, and based on life experiences. Someone growing up poor being told ‘you can’t have what you want’ has a much different pre-set realm of possibility than one who grew up wealthy being told ‘you can have anything you desire, and you deserve the best that life has to offer’. Furthermore, if as an adult you’ve received additional feedback about ‘what is possible for you’, that also goes into the realm of possibilities.

Are you getting a picture of how complicated this can be?

Can you see that how you were raised may be slightly less important that the kinds of personalities support you as an adult?

Can you see how co-creation is more difficult between parties who have opposing realms of possibility?

Many people, if they haven’t heard of others doing something will conclude that it simply cannot be done (which is rarely true) and will not even try. If they are surrounded by people who do not support their desires to be better and do better, they might give up. However, if they have the support of those around them and a creative sense or internal vision of the possibility, they will make an effort…some even feel compelled to try. This is how inventors come up with stuff the rest of us say, “Brilliant idea…why didn’t I think of that?” Engineers who find break-through solutions have done so from an expanded viewpoint of what’s possible. Inventors are willing to open their minds to a greater realm of ‘what is possible?’. Scientists who make great breakthroughs, artists who create new mediums, all of the people who go beyond the barrier of ‘what is possible’ have the same thing in common: A willingness to challenge preconceived ideas and allow themselves to imagine a better way.

Extreme Makeovers: Who Holds the Vision for Improvement?

Extreme makeovers on TV are very popular. Unless you have permanently unplugged your TV, or never owned one, you have likely seen one of the many makeover shows on TV. There have been makeover shows on virtually every theme possible: losing weight, improving wardrobes, decorating or renovating new rooms and/or entire homes, improving physical features or looks…you name it.

I often wonder: What happens to the ‘made over’ after the cameras are gone? How does someone, who has a low opinion of themselves, move forward when others have shown them the possibilities to do and be better? Some follow-up shows have revealed that the inner work needed for change was lacking in these shows, so the recipients went right back to their old way of being. The way of being they knew and were comfortable with experiencing.

A while back, I saw a makeover show on Food Network where an award-winning chef and interior designer came into a run-down restaurant to help the owner improve their business by making over the entire restaurant. New menu and new restaurant decor. The restaurant had been successful once, but started going downhill and never recovered.

Apparently, anyone walking into the restaurant could see (and smell, according to the chef) and probably taste, too, why the restaurant was suffering…anyone, that is, except the owner and his family. They were used to the sights and smells, and had developed a mind-set that it was too hard to change. They no longer saw the possibilities for improvement. They needed outside help to change.

It was also very clear to see that the award-winning experts had a much grander vision of what was possible than the failing restaurant owner. The owner was so stuck in the negativity surrounding the failing of his business that he had a hard time accepting the suggestions of the chef and interior designer. He had not been able (or willing) to see their vision and was highly critical of their efforts until the restaurant makeover was complete. Once he actually stepped into the new vision for his restaurant, and sat down to taste the new menu items, then he was able to grasp what was possible. As a result, he’s kept up with the improvements, and the restaurant is now much more successful than ever before.

That episode of Restaurant Makeover illustrates why so many people stay stuck when they are spirally downward, unable to correct the problems and change course. On one level, they do want improvements, to change their course, shift their experience—but they are so mired in the “what is” that they are unable to envision something greater, something better, something beyond. They absolutely need someone who can see more options, who isn’t mired in “what is”, and can create the space for greater possibility where none existed before. And they must be able to listen without judgement to suggestions that are offered. For many people, that is really hard to do! But, it’s not impossible.

Making Big Changes
So, what do you do when you know big changes need to happen, but you aren’t quite sure change is possible? Here are some suggestions that have worked for me:

Step 1: Decide It starts with deciding that you are ready and want to make big changes. Whatever change you are envisioning will require stepping outside of your comfort zone, and believing something greater is possible. It absolutely cannot be done unless you are committed to the process.

Now, deciding doesn’t guarantee you will know HOW, in that moment, to proceed. However, the power of deciding will set you on the journey of discovering how.

Step 2: Seek help Can you do this on your own? Most people cannot make big changes without the assistance of someone else. We need someone who isn’t emotionally involved in our life to show us other possibilities. Seek an advisor, mentor, coach or counselor who will hold you accountable and help you shift out of your pre-set preconceptions about what is possible for you. Most people choose a coach or counselor because they are readily available, ready to start immediately, and already experienced in helping others.

Step 3: Raise your vibration Allow your subconscious to connect the dots for you. Meanwhile, go do some fun things…go for a walk in the sunshine, play with your pets, visit friends, spend time with loved-ones, meditate, journal, watch an uplifting movie, or whatever you identify as fun for you. Use this time to life yourself vibrationally, and refresh yourself mentally and emotionally.

If you are really struggling, taking a nap to release stress can be very beneficial. You might need to repeat this step many times between the other steps to keep your mind relaxed. A stressed mind will not be helpful, as it is more likely to direct you to vibrationally-equivalent stress-filled ideas and stressful outcomes.

Step 4: Research Find out what the most successful people in the related industry are doing. If you want to lose weight, find out what the experts suggest for diet, exercise, and supporting therapies. These days, the web is a great place to begin searching. Refrain from pre-judging what you read about or deciding that you don’t have the money or resources to do what others have done. Just concentrate on finding out what others have done as it might spur other ideas.

Step 5: Brainstorm Then, it’s time to ask your imagination to provide solutions: Brainstorm ideas, and withhold judgment of any single idea until later. Just let the ideas flow forth. Write down whatever ideas come to you. The more you try this technique, the more ideas will flow. You can even ask the person assisting you to brainstorm with you, if they are willing. Ask first. Most mentors and coaches will do this, but I am not sure about all counselors as different kinds of therapies have different approaches.

Step 6: Take a break before reviewing Remember to rest your mind regularly during this process, and allow yourself to have fun doing things that feel good. Once you feel you have completed your research and brainstorming, set the information aside, and again, go do some fun things. Let your mind relax, while the subconscious works out some solutions. When you are relaxed and feeling good, review your compiled list of ideas. Notice which ideas feel good, even if you are unsure about how to do it, or fear you don’t have the resources/time/money/whatever to go that route. The ones that feel good are the best options for you. This is where a coach or counselor can really help you believe in yourself. Also, notice what new ideas come to mind that might be better options for you. For instance, if you’ve always wanted to learn to dance, consider taking lessons as a way to learn AND get aerobic exercise.

Step 7: Pay attention for right action Right action is the action that is, deep in your heart, right for you. Once your subconscious mind begins to work on these ideas of what’s possible, and you’ve reviewed your research and brainstorming, you may begin noticing opportunities. New information may be sent to you. New ideas will pop into your awareness. Hybrid ideas—a combination of what has been and done what really appeals to you—may bubble up. Be willing to consider ideas that may have seemed out of reach. Pay attention to everything that shows up or comes to mind, and how you feel about each idea.

Follow and take action on everything that feels good to you! The way you feel is guidance for what is best for you…your right action. When you feel sure about a certain action, take it. When you feel unsure or doubtful, go do something else. Often, when we are in a relaxed state, we’ll know exactly what steps are best for us.

A good advisor, mentor, coach or counselor can also support you in weeding out the unhelpful energy, so you can discover the right choices for you.

Is there something in your life that you are now committed to changing? Share below what possibilities you are choosing to believe in….

Image credit: nexusplexus

 

Your Beautiful Power

Dove-Patches-Video

Have you seen this video by Dove?

Showing us in sequence just exactly how powerful our beliefs are in affecting our perceptions, researchers asked women to apply a “Beauty Patch”. They told them what to expect, and asked them to wear the patch as well as keep a video journal. Watch what happened next…

If you are a frequent visitor to this blog, you are probably smiling and nodding your head. The Placebo Effect exhibited in this video is just one of the well-documented examples of how our beliefs can literally change our life experience. Many of us have wondered (more than just out loud), if the Placebo Effect is so effective (at least 30% of all placebos work better than the actual drug being tested), why aren’t we harnessing the power of the placebo with no side effects to heal versus harmful medications? Well, we know the answer from the past…we get to decide the answer for the future. 😉

Actually, many doctors hate the Placebo Effect and think it’s a hindrance drug testing. In fact, the Placebo Effect is so maligned in the medical community that most doctors want to figure out how to ELIMINATE it completely, rather than figure out how to make it work for us so we can take less medications. Imagine how much nations could save in national medical costs if we worked with placebos instead of eliminate them. 😉

Each of these women started the study feeling they needed something outside of them to make them more beautiful, and ended up discovering the deepest truth of life: life is an inside job. What a powerful and beautiful lesson that is!

Now there’s also brain science that can explain how this works. Janette Dalgliesh, the LOA Brain Whisperer, states in her new book, Mastering Your Everyday Superpower:

For me, these concepts lead to one inescapable conclusion: that my reality is unique to me, not just in the sense that it’s my own perception, but in the sense that as I interact with it, there is a two-way flow. I create it through my brain. Sometimes I do that in a self-aware, conscious way, and sometimes I do it in a default, unaware way.

So do you. And so does every human being on the planet.

Amazing, isn’t it? Here’s something else amazing: Mastering Your Everyday Superpower is currently free on Amazon! You want to get your own copy and learn how you can master your own beautiful power.

Disclosure: Because I know Janette Dalgliesh’s work in this area, and believe in the importance of getting this information out to the world, I have chosen to become one of her affiliates. When you make a purchase of Janette’s offerings, you not only benefit from the experience but I am also compensated for sharing this material with you.

How You View It

View - "The Twa Corbies" (The Two Crows) by Arthur Rackham

“The Twa Corbies” (The Two Crows) by Arthur Rackham

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder”, the old adage goes. I would dare say, that it isn’t just beauty, but everything that is in the eye of the beholder. As the beholder of your own life, how are you viewing it?

Last night I had an experience that brilliantly illustrates how one situation can be viewed differently depending on the attitude of the ‘beholder’.

I was enjoying a lovely walk at dusk, enjoying the fresh air, marveling at the gorgeous moon and clear skies. Suddenly, I heard a sound that crows make: rattle or comb call.

Since I live in an area with abundant tall trees, we have a huge assortment of birds and the crows often live at the tops of the tallest trees. I recognized the rattling call, looked around to see where the crows might be, and saw a single crow flying toward me about 20 feet in the air while cawing.

Knowing that everything has consciousness, I smiled at the crow and said hello. I let the crow know I was happy to see it. The crow circled over me cawing to his friends, who quickly joined him. Stopping on the sidewalk, I greeted them all and expressed my appreciation for the visit. You might think this was crazy, unless you had experienced it yourself, but the birds seemed very happy that I was acknowledging them.

I’m guessing they have enough people ignoring them throughout the day, so it probably was very fun to have a non-threatening human actually *see* them.

As I started walking again, the three birds flew with me—above, to the right and left—flying from tree to street lamp to tree ahead of me. As I caught up, they flew to the next one. I smiled at the way they were clearly “playing” with me and enjoying it as much!

So, this is how I went down this residential street, and toward the end I saw a little girl with her father. The girl seemed scared when she saw the birds, and ran to her father’s side. The father saw me with the crows flying about and said, “Oh, I hate these birds! They are so aggressive…” He may have said more, but I was still walking.

I smiled at the father and said, “Oh…I  think they are just having fun and want to play!”

To which he replied, “Yeah, well they play all over my car every night and leave it a mess!”

Just then, I noticed that the birds had stopped playing with me as I passed this man’s house. I know that my pets are sensitive to the energy of humans, so it’s not hard to believe that the birds knew the man did not appreciate them or delight in their games of flight.

This man was so convinced of his story that the birds were a menace. Yet, living in the same neighborhood, I view them as joyful wild playmates. Same experience, yet one saw a reason to be angry, the other saw a reason to be joyful. Which one of us is right?

Both of us are. From our respective and unique vantage points, we each see what we see…driven by the story we are telling ourselves (this is good or bad, right or wrong, etc.). Through the universal Law of Attraction, we are always drawing to us more and more examples that we are right about the stories we’ve been carrying.

The good news is that we can change our story at any time and start experiencing something new.

Right now, I don’t know anyone who isn’t dealing with some hardship or difficulty in their life. Whether it’s health, relationships or prosperity, we are all working on improving some aspect of our lives. How we see our life and how we handle our hardships is directly affected by the stories we are telling about those experiences.

So that leads to an important question: Are you finding a reason to be angry or joyful about your life? Share your thoughts below in the comments.

P. S. After passing that man’s house, I kept walking and the crows caught up with me to resume the game a few houses down the road.  🙂

 

Image credit: “The Twa Corbies” (The Two Crows),
by English illustrator,  Arthur Rackham

May Co=Creation Cafe: The Missing Secret to Parenting

Fresh on the Menu: The Missing Secret to Parenting

featuring special guests
Benni Heacock and Denny Hagel,
of Innovative Parenting, LLC

Do you have a passion to teach your children how the law of attraction works and how to harness its power in their lives? Are you interested in raising a generation of children living their lives free from limiting beliefs? If you wish to see children empowered to claim the life they were born to live, and in so doing, effectively changing the world, then you will want to know about the Missing Secret to Parenting.

Guests Benni Heacock and Denny Hagel, both have a background in psychology and experience working with children. Benni, a counselor in private practice, works with individuals and families. She also teaches workshop to people in education, business, religious organizations, and the private sector. Denny has extensive experience working with children with ADD & ADHD in the school system, and she also home schools her own grandchildren. Benni and Denny are co-owners and directors of Innovative Parenting LLC, and dedicated to helping parents, teachers, and other adults teach the law of attraction to children.

Listen

to this call online, or download the MP3 for on-the-go listening at
AffirmingSpirit.com
<”click this link

After listening to the call, return to this page to submit your comments or questions by clicking the comments link below.

Referenced in the Call:

Innovative Parenting, LLC site (eBooks and ezine)

> Listen to the call for the Co=Creation Cafe discount CODE to save $20 on workshops

> Abraham-Hicks and the link to listen to their introduction CD


Your Co=Creation Cafe Host,

Nancy Barry-Jansson
AffirmingSpirit.com

Cultivating Self-Love

In the latest Co=Creation Cafe, Prosperity Coach Joan Sotkin talks about “It’s NOT About the Money: The Inner Work of Lasting Financial
Well-Being”. In her closing comments, she recommends two important things to the listener. One of them is learning to love yourself, and
self-love is what this post will focus upon.
It would be a very long post if I wrote about ALL the things you can do to cultivate self-love, so let me just hit the high points. Feel free to
share any additional ideas or comments below.
Talk to anyone who has spent time on personal growth and they will tell you: At the basis of every problem (health, wealth, relationships, etc.)
is a lack of self-love.  Louise Hay discovered this when she was doing 1:1 consulting. When we take the time to address this one aspect of
our life, we begin to shift everything for the better.
That said, what does it *mean* to love yourself?
Think of how you feel when you love a pet, a child, or a good friend? How do you feel when you see them? What efforts do you take to help
them or make their life more enjoyable? Do you do the same for yourself?
Self-care is one way that we show self-love to ourselves. For example, we can make time for:
• Regular exercise to keep your body-temple functioning at it’s best
• Daily meditation or quiet contemplation
• Eating healthy sit-down meals
• Taking breaks for deep breathing~from your belly, not shallow breathing from your chest
• Getting to sleep at a regular time, and the right amount of sleep for you to be at your best
• Doing something fun every day~laughter is a powerful medicine
• Counting your blessings (on paper or in your mind) every day
There are countless ways to embrace self-care. Share your favorites in the comments below.
We also show ourselves self-love when we are clear about how we will allow others to treat us. Take a look around your world and notice the
people you respect the most. How do they allow others to treat them? Which of those examples feel *good* to you? Are you doing them
already? If not, consider establishing your boundaries and how you will maintain them.
As I have grown my social network, I have come across some really wonderful, enlightened souls. Unfortunately, I have also come across a
few posers: Those who pretend for the world that they are enlightened, even make their living teaching others, then treat people they see as a
threat with incredible disrespect and lack of kindness. I have empathy for these people, because I realize their actions come from their fears
and lack of self-love.
When someone treats me poorly the first time, I forgive and forget. Hey, we’re all human. Bad days happen. Apologies are accepted.
However, if it happens a second time, I am on alert. This shows me that this person may have a pattern of treating others with negatively to
temporarily feel better.
As a coach, I’ve noticed more than one client *picking a fight* with me just as they are at the point of making a huge shift. See, when someone
is fearful of change, it’s sometimes easier to find fault or lay blame on another person than it is to stand in our power, face the fear, and make
the shift. When a client does this, I know they are not ready to make a change. I understand that.
However, when someone calls me their friend and then makes a habit of treating me poorly, it’s time for me to send them love and move on.
Sure, I could spend time explaining why their behavior is unacceptable, but in my experience~if this is truly their pattern~they will just keep
repeating the pattern. It’s not a matter of IF, but a matter of WHEN. If they can mistreat someone 3 times, they can just as easily do it 300 or
300,000 times.
Dr. Phil says, “We teach people how to treat us.” While I am a very understanding and tolerant person, I’ve learned that no one else will teach
others how to treat me with love and respect. Part of cultivating self-love is making the conscious decision to establish our own boundaries
and then maintain them. We can be loving, understanding, even forgiving, without being a doormat for the ongoing bad behaviors of a few.
What this does is send a powerful message to your inner-self:
• I love myself
• I am deserving of love from myself and others
• I care enough to only allow those who are aligned with that love
• I do not accept poor treatment from myself or others
• I surround myself with people who support and appreciate me
• If I encounter those who are unkind, I bless with love and move on
That’s enough for now. It’s your turn: How do you cultivate self-love? Has this post given you ideas for yourself? If so, please share below so
visitors can learn from your wisdom.

In the November 2009  Co=Creation Cafe, Prosperity Coach Joan Sotkin discusses “It’s NOT About the Money: The Inner Work of Lasting Financial Well-Being“. In her closing comments, she recommends two important things to the listener. One of them is learning to love yourself…and self-love is what this post will focus upon.

It would be a very long post if I wrote about ALL the things you can do to cultivate self-love, so let me just hit the high points. Feel free to share any additional ideas or comments below.

Talk to anyone who has spent time on personal growth and they will tell you: At the basis of every problem (health, wealth, relationships, etc.) is a lack of self-love. Louise Hay discovered this when she was doing 1:1 consulting. When we take the time to address this one aspect of our life, we begin to shift everything for the better.

That said, what does it really *mean* to love yourself? How does one cultivate self-love?

Think of how you feel when you love a pet, a child, or a good friend? How do you feel when you see them? What efforts do you take to help them or make their life more enjoyable? Do you extend the same courtesies to yourself? Part of being a Deliberate Creator is to align your vibration with the Divine Source of All-That-Is~the loving energy that is the basis of everything we experience with our multiple-senses.

Self-care is an important way that we exhibit and cultivate self-love. For example, we can make time for:

> Regular exercise to keep your body-temple functioning at it’s best

> Daily meditation or quiet contemplation

> Eating healthy sit-down meals

> Consciously choosing supportive thoughts/beliefs (affirmations, visualizations)

> Taking breaks for deep breathing~from your belly, not shallowly from your chest

> Getting to sleep at a regular time, and the right amount of sleep for you to be at your best

> Doing something fun every day~laughter is a powerful medicine

> Counting your blessings (on paper or in your mind) often and regularly

This is just a short-list. There are countless ways to embrace self-care. If you’d like more information, listen to the February and March 2009 Co=Creation Cafe Calls about Nurturing Your Most Important Relationship (Parts I & II). Have favorites of your own? Be sure to share them in the comments below.

We also show ourselves self-love when we are clear about how we will allow others to treat us. Take a look around your world and notice the people you respect the most. How do they allow others to treat them? Which of those examples feel *good* to you? Are you doing them already? If not, consider establishing your boundaries and deciding how you will maintain them.

As I have grown my social network, I have come across some really wonderful, enlightened souls. Unfortunately, I have also come across a few posers: Those who pretend for the world that they are enlightened, even make their living teaching others, then treat people they see as a threat with incredible disrespect and lack of kindness. I have empathy for these people, because I realize their actions ultimately come from their fears and lack of self-love.

When someone treats me poorly the first time, I forgive and forget. Hey, we’re all human. Bad days happen. Apologies are accepted.

However, if it happens a second time, I am on alert. This shows me that this person may have a pattern of treating others negatively in order to temporarily feel better.

As a coach, I’ve noticed more than one client *picking a fight* with me just as they are at the point of making a huge shift. See, when someone is fearful of change, it’s sometimes easier to find fault or lay blame on another person than it is to stand in our power, face the fear, and make the shift. When a client does this, I know they are not ready to make a change. I understand that. Usually, they are looking for an easy exit, and picking a fight is easier than saying, “I don’t think I’m ready just yet. Can we take a break?”

However, when someone calls me their friend and then makes a habit of treating me poorly, it’s time for me to send them love and move on.

Sure, I could spend time explaining why their behavior is unacceptable, but in my experience they usually don’t want to hear this truth, AND~if this is truly their pattern~they will just keep repeating the pattern. It’s not a matter of IF, but a matter of WHEN. If they can mistreat someone 3 times, they can just as easily do it 300 or 300,000 times.

I don’t quote Dr. Phil often, but I do agree when he says, “We teach people how to treat us.” While I am a very understanding and tolerant person, I’ve learned that no one else (except me) will teach others how to treat me with love and respect. Therefore, part of cultivating self-love is making the conscious decision to establish our own boundaries and then consciously maintain them. We can be loving, understanding, even forgiving, without being a doormat for the ongoing bad behaviors of a few.

When we consciously set boundaries and then maintain them, we send a powerful message to our inner-self:

> I love and respect myself

> I am deserving of love and respect from myself and others

> I care enough to only allow those who are aligned with my own love and respect

> I do not accept poor treatment from myself or others

> I take responsibility for loving, respecting, and protecting myself

> I surround myself with people who love, respect, support and appreciate me

> If I encounter those who are unkind, I bless them with love and move on

That’s enough for now. It’s your turn: How do you cultivate self-love? Has this post given you ideas for yourself? If so, please share below so visitors can learn from your wisdom.

The Power of Declaration

One of the most valuable lessons I learned about the Law of Attraction (LOA), and the one I hear talked about least, is the importance of letting go of the doubt and questioning, and replacing it with intent and declaration. You don’t have to completely work through the doubt, just be willing to set it aside and choose to speak with positive intent.

I talk to people who say they know all about LOA, have been practicing it for 10-20 years, who seem to be completely unaware of this truth or it’s power to create change. They talk about themselves, their life, and their services in a series of doubts and questions:

I’m trying something new, so I guess we’ll see…

I don’t know what I’m going to do…how do I get more traffic on my website?

I’m wondering WHAT I am doing that’s creating all these problems?

I have no idea where my next client is coming from…

It will be interesting to find out if this marketing is ever going to work…

Oh, my schedule is so crazy, I have no idea if I’ll have time for that [fill in the blank] next week. I really want to do it, but I don’t…

OK, I could go on, but I think you get the picture. In fact, you may recognize some of these statements in your own experience. If you want to create something new, you have to speak positively of its possibility, not the lack or doubt of it.

Let’s step back for a moment and review some fundamentals of the Law of Attraction: Your thoughts attract experiences that match in tone and vibration. Therefore, you get what you think about, whether you want it or not. Since you are almost always thinking during your waking hours, how you think/feel affects every aspect of your life.

Everyone who understands LOA will agree with the above, although the mechanics of it are a bit more complicated*. Mechanics aside, many LOA practitioners forget that you are creating through thoughts and feelings even when you are complaining, worrying, or saying that ‘nothing is working’. When you are making statements about your doubt, your fears, your worries, your concerns, you are still creating MORE of those doubtful, fearsome, or worrisome experiences.

Whatever you give your attention to, even if it is the LACK of something, you are also giving energy to it, and therefore, it is growing in response to your attention. You are literally creating the possibility when you give it attention, which means life is always making you right~everything you speak is an affirmation of something!

If you believe you are being disrespected, you’ll suddenly see evidence of this all around you.

If you are focusing mostly on where you are failing, or unsure, you are creating more experiences to feel like you are failing or unsure.

If you are focusing on a lack of clients or marketing success, you are creating more experiences that will point out the lack of clients or marketing success.

If you are doubting your abilities, LOA will line you up with proof to support your doubt.

If you are constantly asking questioning yourself, you will be shown more reasons to question yourself.

What’s equally true is this: When you get very clear about what you want (respect, success, clarity, clients, confidence, and self-esteem), and begin *intending* to experience these qualities, you will ALSO be shown proof of them!

Even if you don’t know how to accomplish your goal, if you remember that you are a creative being and what you state is possible to create, you can begin making powerful statements of intent.  By shifting your questions into declarations of what you desire to experience, you can begin to shift your experiences. That’s powerful and deliberate creation! When you open up to the possibility of change, even when you have no clue how to change, repeated declarations of intent will draw to you the people, resources, and opportunities to experience what you declared.

Don’t take my word for it, though…try it out for yourself. Stop doubting, start declaring. Notice where you have introduced doubt and confusion into your thoughts, and choose instead to declare what you prefer to experience. Then, share what you notice in the comments below…we can all learn from each other!

Remember to allow yourself to notice any emotions and thoughts come up when you try to shift your questions to declarations. Feel those emotions and give them your loving attention until they pass. They are important clues to any subconscious blocks that may be preventing you from moving forward. However, if you feel stuck in negative emotions, find a coach or therapist who will help you move through them.

*Your heart is 100 times more powerful electrically, and up to 5,000 times more powerful magnetically, than your brain. So, the electro-magnetic field generated by emotions, felt by your heart, is very powerful and connected to the Quantum Field of Possibilities! Research has shown that atoms are changed either electrically or magnetically, so our hearts have the capacity to change the atoms around us. If you’d like to know more, visit Gregg Braden and Dr. Bruce Lipton‘s sites, and search YouTube for some of their informative videos.

Law of Attwaction (LoA on Twitter)

Twitter amazes me. I’ve said it before: Prior to joining Twitter and tweeting, NO ONE could convince me that it was possible to forge a relationship 140 characters at a time, let alone make a difference in people’s lives. Further, I would never believe it could be such a vehicle for the Law of Attraction to play out. Nor could I imagine how it would let me make a difference in other people’s lives just by being who I am naturally. Yet, everyday, I receive tweets and direct messages thanking me for sharing something that made a huge difference in another person’s life.

Take Melody Campbell (@SmBizGuru) for instance. She observed one of her followers tweeting me on #MaMo (Manifesting Monday, the virtual manifestation circle on Twitter) about a subject that appealed to her. She retweeted that message (sent it again so her followers could read it), asking to be included in the #MaMo process.

I know from teaching|mentoring|coaching my clients that there is no such thing as a one-size-fits-all quick fix. Every client must follow their own path to success. I know that many times people ask for something, but don’t really think they can actually have/create what they are asking for. The lack of belief is the real stumbling block, not what they are asking for! I also know that asking powerful questions can get a client to look a little deeper than they have before, which helps them develop a deeper awareness. Every drop of awareness helps as we grow in consciousness and personal power, which is then reflected in everything we manifest into our lives.

So, when Melody tweeted me, I started by asking her a few questions to help her decide how committed she was to experiencing positive change. Each time I asked a question gave her a chance to go a little deeper. She replied, and we went back and forth a number of times. At one point, she seemed resistant so I teased her a bit about whether she really wanted to know the answer. She insisted she did, and after that really tried to answer the questions honestly.

When I could see she was serious about wanting the answer, I intuited that one of the videos I tweet about often would be of great value to her and sent her the link. Turns out, the information I was providing was completely new to Melody even though I had been tweeting about it for the past 6 months! This was not only all new to her, but with the new awareness from answering my questions, she was now really *ready to hear* the message.

Unbeknownst to me, prior to our intweraction (OK, I just made up that word to describe interaction on Twitter), Melody had been praying for some answers to her deeper questions. So, on that day, she was finally *ready* to hear the answer to her prayers, and that’s when she saw my tweets with one of her followers. I see this as the Universe delivering Melody’s request in the most expedient way. She asked, and when she was ready to receive the answer came to her…while she happened to be on Twitter!

The next day, Melody sent me these two Direct Messages: (read bottom one first)

…and sent me this testimonial:

Thank you for connecting with me on Twitter!

Our encounter was brief, but right on target. Nancy and I connected on Twitter with a few succinct 140 character exchanges. Her comments went right to my heart issue like a magnet to steel. She shared a tiny nugget of truth that has played a very large part in a major breakthrough within 24 hours of our exchange. Nancy is not only knowledgeable but she’s “in-tune”. She was a channel for the answer that I had been praying for. I am blessed to have shared this important exchange with her.

Melody Campbell, Conrad, MontanaNight www.TheSmallBusinessGuru.com

So, by being who I am naturally whilst Twittering, yet another person was able to experience an amazing breakthrough. That’s pretty amazing to me and further proof that not only is the Law of Attwaction *alive and active* on Twitter, but we live in an *amazing Universe* that is constantly seeking ways to deliver what we have to offer…and what we need to receive. Are you ready to hear the message?

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UPDATE: I posted this in the early hours of 6/19, and later that morning logged back onto Twitter just 5 minutes before Melody’s live weekly Get More Business BTR show. Her guest was unable to join the call, and she was asking for folks to call in. I did, so here is the recording of the impromptu show we did entitled, “Law of Attwaction”. Please submit your comments or questions below or at TheSmallBusinessGuru.com.

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How Our Attitudes Mirror Our Life Experiences

A week ago, I found myself quietly picking lint balls off of freshly clean linen. After a while, I realized I was surprisingly happy doing this rather mundane task. A thought came to mind that one can be happy no matter what they are doing (must be what all those Buddhists have been telling us for centuries), as long as we have chosen a supportive mindset. With that thought in mind, I sent this tweet:

Fast forward to this evening. I just finished watching the BBC’s 1985 adaptation of George Bernard Shaw’s play “The Millionairess” starring Maggie Smith. At first blush, the plot was convoluted and bizaare. I kept checking and rechecking the Netflix movie synopsis to make sure I had the right movie because they didn’t seem to match. Eventually, the plot manages gets to the point, but at the end of the movie I found myself *enlightened*. Quite unexpectedly so, I might also add!

The play’s main character, Epifania, is a truly obnoxious millionairess with little-to-no social skills living in 1930s London. From a long line of banking magnates, Epifania the millionairess is stingy with her own money…but deep into the play, and almost at the point where I lost all interest, she decides to divorce her current husband to marry a Muslim doctor. Before they can do so, and in order to fulfill parental wishes, she must live as a pauper for 6 months, during which the husband-to-be must take $150£ and turn it into $50,000£. They are meet to again in 6 months to prove they have fulfilled the bargain.

Whether you intend to see this play or not, I don’t want to reveal the full plot except to say that it is quite revealing. Even when left to fend for herself with very little cash, she immediately discovers ways to make more money for her employers or even take over their businesses entirely. She makes bold decisions that turn out to be very savvy, proving that while she doesn’t have to work, she has learned a tremendous amount from her family’s banking business. Let’s just say, she doesn’t spend very much time being a pauper.

It reminded me of the real estate investment guy who claimed you can drop him anywhere in the U.S. with $100USD and he’d find a way to turn it into a fortune. Some people are like that: They see income opportunities where the rest of the world is counting up all the debt. Come to think of it, we need some of those people in the world right now!

What does this have to do with my tweet?

How you view your life is truly a metaphor for how you experience it.

If you believe life is hard, that’s how you will experience your life. If you believe your health is bad, that’s how you will experience your health. If you believe that you will always have to struggle to have money, that’s how you will experience money.

Choose to experience your life as easy, feel it in your heart, then it will morph into that experience! Choose to see and feel yourself healthy, and your cells will respond! Choose everyday to count your blessings, feel yourself as wealthy, and your bank account will mirror that shift!

In all the examples above, nothing has changed except your heart-centured *attitude*. Embrace an attitude that your life is blessed, and you will soon see evidence showing up all around you. Gregg Braden has explained this in terms of Quantum Possibilities. Western Science is now catching up with this knowledge, which indigenous and tribal cultures have known for centuries. Watch this video excerpt with Gregg Braden to understand how your heart-centered attitude creates your experiences:

If the above video interests you, you might also be interested in these clips of Gregg Braden from the same movie:
The Union of Thought and Emotion and The Language of Compassion.

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