The Magical Power of Anger

magical

The magical power of anger

That’s right: magical! There’s magic in our ability to transmute our anger, not just for our business but for all aspects of our lives.

Personally, I don’t know any business owner who doesn’t, at least occasionally, experience anger in running their business. One of the hot spots are tricky experiences with vendors.

Ideally, vendors support you in your business so you can fully support your clients and customers with ease. You rely on your vendors, and they become part of what makes you and your business successful.

In worst case scenarios, though, difficult vendor experiences can actually harm or derail your businesses. I don’t need to list the potential difficulties for you…and we don’t need to dwell there, either.

In your anger and frustration with the situation, your instincts might have you making rash decisions you’ll regret and send you scrambling to find alternative providers.

LOA savvy business owners know that is a trap: ‘what we resist, persists’.

Any action you take will reflect the energy with which it was taken. The angry journey reveals an angry result.

If you don’t clean up the anger with one vendor, you’ll just experience similar energy with the next, and the next, and the next. Worse case, that anger will seep into other aspects of your business and cultivate more resentment.

However, when you embrace the magical power within your emotions, you’ll gain understanding of your limiting beliefs, and get clues to resolving not only the current issue, but any future issue, as well!

Navigate tricky vendor relations

The most reliable, and sustainable way, to manage difficult vendor relations is by understanding the energy of your emotions and the magic that is within.

This past week, I was pondering various topics to write for my next blog post, and then I received a gift of an intensely frustrating vendor experience. Don’t you just love when your real-life business hands you such opportunities?

OK, for some of you, that sounds like a ‘trick question’. It’s really not! Aware and savvy business owners learn how to manage their energy and transmute the difficult experiences into growth opportunities.

Now, I don’t go out of my way to seek anger, but over the years I’ve learned about that it’s worth my energy and attention to transmute the anger. Below is yesterday’s story broken down into the steps that helped me do exactly that: Transmute the anger into magic!

The time it takes to work through these steps will depend on your situation, and how long you’ve been practicing these skills.

STEP ONE: FEEL IT, FULLY

When you notice you are angry, give yourself a moment to really feel it in your body. This serves three purposes: 1.) Increases your awareness of your own emotions, 2.) Allows the limiting beliefs and stories (which hold the emotion in place) to surface, and 3.) This is the starting place for transmuting the emotion.

Feel the emotion doesn’t mean dwell there. Or stop there. Or let it derail you. It means allow yourself to feel what you really feel, including all levels of anger and sadness, before you continue with your inner work. Without giving yourself a few minutes to really feel your emotions, you might stuff them and the magical transmutation never has a chance to start.

So, here’s how I applied this step. Late on Monday, I became aware that a vendor had charged me for services I never requested for the second month in a row….and was only just finding out about it. It was too late in the evening to do anything, so I decided to deal with it on Tuesday.

I was so angry about it that when Tuesday morning rolled around, I was ready to fire them on the spot, and see if they had broken industry regulations by not notifying me sooner. The anger in me was so intense that I felt vengeful. I kept wanting to pick up the phone to chew someone’s face off. But each time I started to dial the number, I realized my energy was too intense and I needed to step back before going any further.

STEP TWO: NOTICE THE ‘STORY’

When we’re angry, odds are pretty high that we have a ‘story’ in place that made us angry and keeps us stuck there. In some cases, it’s not just one story, but several ‘stories’…past, present, and even future ones!

Once you’ve properly given yourself some time to feel the feeling, start noticing what story is playing in your head about this situation.

Admittedly, I was so angry yesterday, that I wasn’t able to do this after I became aware of my feelings. In fact, it wasn’t until after I ordered myself to calm down, that I eventually heard myself rehashing the ‘stories’ I had going on: They are really pissing me off! This is so wrong—I won’t let them get away with it! What makes them think they can take advantage of me? I’ve been a good client for them for years, I don’t deserve this! This cannot be legal…I should report them! What kind of slimy business are they running? How many other people are they abusing?

Spot the stories? I had already concluded that they had willingly wronged me and were doing it to others. Feeling victimized. Ready to get revenge! They were running a slimy operation.

Yeah, it was the last one that got my attention. Extremes often show up in ‘stories’ that keep us stuck in anger. In the past, I would have sat down and made a list of these crazy stories so I could address them, one-by-one, but having done this so often…I took mental note and quickly moved to step three.

STEP THREE: QUESTION THE ‘STORY’

Or (multiple) stories. Question them. In my case, I did The Work: Is this really true? Can I absolutely be sure this is true? How do I feel when I think this thought? How would I feel if I didn’t have this story? Turn it around.

For me, the first story being questioned looked like this:
They are really pissing me off!

Is this really true? YES!

Can I absolutely be sure this is true? YES!

How do I feel when I think this thought? UGH! It makes me even angrier!

How would I feel if I didn’t have this thought? I might not be so angry, or I might not be angry at all. I might be calmer and thinking more clearly.

Turn it around: I am pissing them off!; I am pissing myself off!

Oh, yeah…there it is! Truth prevails.

As soon as I stated the second ‘turn around’, I immediately saw how I was the one who was creating my anger and I was blaming them for making me feel angry. No one can make me, or any of us, feel anything unless I/we give them the power to do so.

Just questioning the first story made it easy to de-escalate, and calm down. I started laughing at how I had frothed myself up in anger without having all the details or information. I was already feeling better as I sailed through questioning the other stories that propped up my anger.

STEP FOUR: LET AWARENESS BRING CLARITY

The transmutation was in process! Once I had calmed down, gained awareness by questioning my stories, it became really clear to me: When it came down to it, I didn’t have the full story. I was only seeing ‘my side’ and needed to communicate with the vendor to get the full story.

All I had was a statement showing that they had billed me for non-requested (and un-received) services, and I had allowed myself to stir up my own feelings of anger.

What do I really want to experience? I wanted to speak to the vendor to get the full story, to have my account corrected, and monies refunded.

I grabbed the statement and a piece of paper. At the top of the paper, I wrote the date, the vendor’s name and phone number. Under that, I wrote 3 words to describe how I wanted the situation to unfold:

Calm, Smooth, Easy.

Then, I wrote my objectives:

  • Ask about the statement.
  • Get the account corrected.
  • Get any refund, if applicable.

The magic was activated and ready to launch!

STEP FIVE: TAKE ACTION WITH CLEAN ENERGY

By now, I’ve felt my full emotion, noticed the stories, questioned them, and gotten clear on what I want to transpire and set my intentions. I felt so much calmer, relaxed, and at ease. Knowing that this was all going to work out, I picked up the phone and dialed the number. While it rang, I reminded myself: Calm. Smooth. Easy.

The first person I spoke to couldn’t answer any question and seemed confused. He was reflecting some of my earlier wonky energy. I knew it was time to get my energy clear: I silently re-affirmed Calm, Smooth, and Easy.

As soon as I did this, he transferred me to a second person. I re-explained the problem, and this second guy had answers for ALL my questions! His voice was pleasant and helpful as he pulled up my statement on his computer, saw the charges, then researched the requests which triggered the charges. In a calm and helpful tone, he saw the error (another client’s charges were showing up on my statement), and began apologizing.

“Let me fix this immediately. I am so sorry for this mix-up, and so glad you called!”

A computer error — that explained a lot! Immediately, in just a few minutes, he fixed the error, refunded monies automatically charged, corrected my balance due, asked if he could do anything more, and cheerfully wished me a good day.

Talk about a magical experience! I never had to raise my voice, and was easily able to remain calm during the entire encounter. The experience was smooth and easy, just as I had written down while I was getting clear on my preferred outcome. Doubt that would have been the case had I called earlier in the day when I was so angry!

STEP SIX: REST AND REVIEW

I was smiling when I got off the phone. I had been on quite the magical ’emotional journey’, going from vengeful white-hot angry to calm and satisfied, in just a few hours.

After taking a break, I came back to my office and took stock of what happened. (That’s when it became obvious that writing this post was the next step.) Take the time to learn from your experiences. If you could have done better, take note. If you did a good job, acknowledge yourself.

Without a doubt, I did a REEEAAAAALLLLY good job of feeling my feeling fully. (giggle) Although, it might have served me to notice the stories sooner. Giving myself some ‘space’ so I could, finally, notice the stories…essential to this whole process! So glad I didn’t take action when I was really angry. Very happy that I questioned the stories, and was able to laugh, before getting clear on what I really wanted. Making the call with clear energy and intentions completed the anger-to-magic transmutation.

Come to think of it, if this vendor hadn’t made the mistake to begin with, I wouldn’t have gone on this emotional journey or learned so much about myself in the process…let alone, been able to share it with you. For that, I am very appreciative of that vendor and their mistake. Bless them!

Did this post give you some insights into transmuting your own anger? Or how to work through a sticky vendor, client, or employee situation? If so, share your insights below.

Image Credit: fergregory

Energy Lessons from Dogs

dogsIf you’ve been reading my blog posts about the power of our energy and our influence on the world around us, but it’s still not making sense to you…please to direct your attention to dogs.

Yes, you read that right. Dogs!

Energy lessons from dogs

Dogs are pack animals who look to the ‘Alpha’ in their pack for energetic cues and direction. This makes dogs a perfect reflection of their human’s energy.

If you’ve ever watched Cesar Millan work with dogs, you’ve seen countless times how an out-of-control dog calms down when the energy is corrected. In any of his shows, The Dog Whisperer, Leader of the Pack, Cesar 911, or his new show Dog Nation, you’ll see in real-time how Millan teaches the humans to better manage their energy and their dog responds!

Below is just one video clip of a couple who had a dog who would constantly initiate fights with other dogs. In a few minutes, he helps these humans see how their dog responds to their energy…

How does a relaxed dog behave? They are calm, happy, and more sociable.

Most problems with dogs occur when their humans are not taking the Alpha aka Leader of the Pack role. The dogs, in their desperation for a pack leader, take on the role themselves and havoc ensues.

The Universe is a lot like a dog

Just like a dog, the Universe is responding to your energy.

Your energy is instructing the Universe, via the law of attraction, which life experiences and people to send your way. Whatever signal you are sending, the law of attraction is lining up similar energy. Like energies cohere (come together) and unlike energies de-cohere (repel).

When your signal to the Universe is mixed, just like when you give a dog mixed signals, the results are equally mixed. When you only observe ‘what-is’ around you, and refuse to focus deliberately, you are relinquishing your creative powers to others around you.

When your signal to the Universe is clear, deliberate, and consistent, you will see that reflected in your results.

LOA savvy business owners know it is important to keep their own energy clear, deliberate, and consistent. They actively engage positive and uplifting people, media (including movies, audios, podcasts, and books), and they deliberately focus their attention on their businesses, too.

When you’re actively and deliberately focusing your energy in positive and uplifting ways, your business and your clients / customers will reflect that energy back to you. Don’t take my word for it…try it for yourself!

So, now it’s your turn: What are you willing to do to keep your own energy clear, deliberate, and consistent? Share in your comments below…

 

 

Image credit: Still from Cesar 911 video

Preparing for the New Year

New Year Transition

It’s that time of year again.

As everyone finalizes their holiday shopping, and settles into the final few weeks of the year, business owners start to contemplate what the new year has to offer.

Some business owners view the future with excitement, a light heart, and joyful anticipation. While some are overwhelmed with fear, doubt, worry, and trepidation.

Why is that?

For centuries, business experts have recommended ongoing planning and forecasting as a part of running a successful business. Basically, they believe that a whole lotta focus on ‘what is’ will help improve business. Deliberate Creators, however, understand that left-brained what-is-focused business planning has its limits. Fire up your spreadsheets and business data, all you want, but there’s more than *facts* deciding outcomes.

How Our Energy Affects Our Business Planning

Energetically, all businesses reflect how the business owner feels (thoughts + emotions) about all aspects of the business, products/services, clients, working conditions, employees (if applicable), and so forth. If there are employees and business partners, then their energy is also a part of this mix.

Because I know this, I consciously make business planning a relaxed, easy, and joyful experience. As I take action on those plans, the results will have that same relaxed, easy, joyful energy.

Every 90 days or so, I take some quiet time for a planning and forecasting session. I review my business targets and imagine what I’d like to experience moving forward. It won’t surprise you that the majority of time during these sessions is spent getting into the feeling place of ALREADY experiencing my targets.

During these planning sessions, I have candles lit, relaxing music playing, my kitty cat slumbering nearby, and ensure I’m in a relaxed and appreciative energy for pre-paving my future. This way, my mind is open, clear, and most receptive to good ideas.

If I’m not sure about my targets or what I want to create, I spend a few minutes doing Pure Awareness meditation to still my mind and raise my vibration before I remember how Source views me and my business. This is enough to put me in a fabulous energy field for imagining my highest excitement for my business.

If I only focused on the left-brain data and planning for my business, I might get stuck in What-Is-ville —never seeing a viable way out of quagmires.

My Silent Business Partner

new yearOver the years, I’ve learned that the energy with which I make decisions and take actions is mirrored back to me in the result.

Like that time when I was not sure what a design client was really looking for, and spent most of the project time swimming in doubt as I questioned all my creative choices, only to have the client question me with the SAME DOUBT (verbatim) when she reviewed the project!

GULP.

That’s when I remembered that the energy that creates worlds is always my silent business partner (and yours, too!). That experience taught me to get clear about being of excellent service, being guided to the right choices, and opening to the intuitive knowing of my client’s unspoken needs. When I do, the resulting work thrills the client! (That has been my secret to ‘exceeding client expectations’ all these years.)

So…once my environment is set, and the planning session begins, I start answering these questions:

  1. What do I appreciate most about my business? (I milk this)
  2. What would I like to expand in my business? (I reach for what feels better)
  3. What am I ready to release in my business? (I follow my guidance)
  4. What am I willing and ready to receive help with as I move forward? (ditto)
  5. How do I expect to feel once my business has expanded (2, above), I’ve released what no longer serves (3, above), and I’ve received help (4, above)? (paint the picture)
  6. What can I do now to feel that way (5, above)?
  7. After spending a few minutes feeling the feeling of 5 and 6, above, I ask: What additional inspired actions come to mind? (Write it down)

Number 1 puts me in appreciative energy. Number 2 – 4 provides my next quarterly ‘targets’, and 5 – 6 help me tap into that energy. Finally, Number 7 is actually ongoing. Whatever information comes to me in the session, I write down, and take the action that feels like the next logical step.

Hours, days, or even weeks later, additional inspirations will spring up in my awareness. Some may feel completely unrelated. Like calling a friend. Or going grocery shopping. Yet, by following the inspiration, I will meet, talk with, or discover something that helps improve my business.

Your turn! What do you do to prepare for the new year? Share your comments and suggestions below…

Image credit: (top) Barry-Jansson & Associates
(mirror) ttatty

The Key to Better Decisions

decisionsMaking good decisions is a big part of being alive, and has an even bigger role for the self-employed. Wouldn’t you love to know that you can easily improve your decision making skills while also improving your health, reducing your stress, and having more fun?!?

Sounds amazing, right. It is!

Relax Into It

As I’ve written before, there is tremendous power in relaxing on a regular basis. Research is showing us that when we’re relaxed, we think clearer. Solutions come to us quicker when we’re not stressed. Our DNA relaxes, too, opening up access to receptors that allow us to heal our body. The list of  benefits goes on. Plus, we’re also a lot more fun to be around when we aren’t stressed out of our mind.

Decisions Come with Ease

Marc Allen is a successful composer and the multi-millionaire founder of publishing house, New World Library. (He originally founded Whatever Publishing with Shakti Gawain, which later became New World Library). In this wonderful 2011 interview with Lilou Mace, Marc candidly and humorously shares his personal journey to creating and sustaining his successful business.

If you haven’t watched this before, grab your favorite drink and enjoy this inspiring conversation. (Even if you have watched it before, it’s fun to watch each time.)

Marc has thrived the most when he made regular time for relaxation, with his attention on appreciation and his custom affirmations…and struggled when he forgot his practice. As a result, he’s learned to build some serious relaxation time into his business, beginning with his unique work schedule. Marc works Tuesday through Friday, after 1pm only, and part of Saturday. The rest of the time he reserves to ensure he has plenty of time to rest, relax, and watch clouds float by. His business flourishes when he makes time for this important practice.

His examples shows that you can start a great business with little money, and grow it successfully with ease. Here’s his favorite affirmation:

MarcAllen_financialSuccess
After watching this video, and learning how relaxation, appreciation, and affirmations can improve your business decision-making, what are you inspired to do next? Please share your thoughts below in the comments.

Staying Inspired in Your Business

staying inspired

For me, it’s not enough to just ‘get inspired’. Staying inspired in my business is very important to me.

One of the tools I use, and find very helpful, is to look for the inspiration I see in others – not because I want to do what they’re doing, but because I enjoy observing their energy, their inspiration which then boosts my own.

When we feel inspired, either on our own or through watching someone else, that is the signal we are sending out to the universe. Likewise, the Universe will mirror back that feeling of inspiration in other parts of our life and business.

Staying Inspired

It’s been said that we are the sum of the 5 people we hang around most. What if you don’t have business examples around you to find unique inspiration? Look for them in the greater world. Thanks to the Law of Attraction, the more you look, the more you’ll find!

Here are a few examples of who I take inspiration from:

Pete Nelson, ‘The Treehouse Guy’– If you’ve ever seen Animal Planet’s Treehouse Masters, then you’ve witnessed this guy’s infectious enthusiasm for all things trees and treehouses. We’re not talking dinky little kid-only treehouses. He designs, then builds with a team, the kind of ideal-for-all-ages treehouses that make your jaw drop. Many include indoor plumbing, heating, internet/wi-fi and full electrical…and amazing views. It’s not hard to see why Pete is so enthusiastic.

What fascinates me is that Pete has a degree in Economics, but his heart had never grown tired of treehouses. His creativity and enthusiasm would not be contained. In a leap of faith, he and his wife decided to start a business based on treehouses . They built a few on their property for an event center and overnight retreats, and taught workshops on building treehouses. They also sell the supplies for making treehouses. Pete has written a number of books about the most amazing and beautiful treehouses all across the globe. That was many years ago, and now with the TV show where he custom designs and manages the building of treehouses all over the U.S., their company is reaching even more people.

I cannot imagine him doing anything else, and it’s addicting to watch the sheer joy and delight he delivers with each project. At the end of each show, he leaves his viewers with lesson from life he’s learned from the trees.

Even if you have invested in a more conventional education, but your heart is calling you to do more creative work, listen to your heart. If Pete and his wife could create a viable business out of treehouses, you can create one doing what you love, too.

Oprah Winfrey, ‘OWN Network’ – I have to mention Oprah, who has inspired millions of people for different reasons. The reason she inspires me? After 25 years of a highly successful TV show, Oprah didn’t owe anyone anything. She could have retired early and lived out a comfortable life as a billionaire. No one would have faulted her for doing so.

Instead of retreating or retiring, Oprah also followed her heart by starting her own television network that would feature unique shows others networks wouldn’t offer, such as Super Soul Sunday, spiritual conversations, and the stunningly beautiful series Belief, exploring how different and similar our beliefs are across the globe.

Starting a new network is not for the faint of heart, and Oprah had many doubts and fears. She did it anyway, because that is where her heart was calling her. She was willing to risk her fortune to make it happen. She was willing to walk her spiritual talk. Along the way, she’s healing herself and others.

If you have a cushy job and bank account(s), it can be scary to step away and try doing something that hasn’t been done before…or currently isn’t being done…to follow your heart’s calling. Yet, when we do, it just feels right…to us. Even if it doesn’t feel right to anyone else.

Neville Goddard, ‘New Thought Author and Lecturer’Neville Goddard is the first example here who is no longer alive, but still an amazing inspiration to me. He lived and worked in the 20th century, and died in the 1970s. There have been a LOT of people in the last 150 years who have been New Thought authors and/or lecturers, but (to me) very few have the ability to express metaphysical concepts so eloquently as Mr. Goddard. There is something about his writing that literally transports me AND allows me understand the concepts at a very deep level.

I’ve lost track of how many times I have sat in awe while re-reading Neville’s writings, realizing that I am understanding the material NOW at an even deeper level due to his phrasing and stories. In those moments, I am simultaneously filled with deep appreciation for his work as a metaphysical teacher AND inspired by his communication skills. It is my full intention to help others the way that Neville has helped me.

Neville didn’t set out to do this work. He was called to it by his own teacher, a Christian Mystic of Arab descent who recognized Neville as the one he was to teach the esoteric mysteries that had been handed down to him. They met when Neville was ‘inspired’ to attend a talk given by the man who would become his teacher. It took a while for Neville to recognize this calling, as well. Once he did, however, he never looked back and the world is so much better off for it.

If you haven’t found your calling, don’t despair. Stay curious and open to possibilities. Allow inspiration to direct you on your own path. It might be a path that you will have to create. Or, you might be creating a new branch from someone elses path. Trust that you are in the right place, with the right people, at the right time.

There are countless people who inspire me, and these are just a few. The ones who inspire me have followed their heart, despite their education and/or background. They excel at what they do, and their ‘heart’ shows in their work. I am inspired as a business owner by these people because they are showing me that I can follow my own heart, excel at what I do, and show my heart every day in my work.

It’s your turn: Who helps reignite inspiration for your own business? Share your insights in the comments below…

Getting Out of the “How” Business

how - letting go[This article was previously published on AffirmingSpirit.com. It has been revised and updated for the enjoyment of blog-readers.]

Recently, I have written about embracing change, the power of decision, and believing in what’s possible as tools for creating powerful positive change in your life. Once you open the door to possibilities, your intuitive guidance will begin to show you options. Here is when it is critical to move past the next trap: Wanting to control “how” everything manifests.

Paralyzed by the need to control or see exactly how their wish will materialize, many folks cease taking any action. They need to know exactly how, from start to finish, they will accomplish their goal. The lack of knowing how becomes an excuse never to even begin taking action toward their desired goal. Since a clear solution does not seem available, or viable, they then conclude that their goal is simply not possible. Many goals die a quiet death in this trap.

The truth is “how” your goal manifests is not up to you…at all. That’s the job of the Universe that is orchestrating all beyond your comprehension. It’s your job to sift through all your experiences to decide what it is you really want to experience, and which of those you are really going to pursue, put yourself into the feeling of it as if it’s already manifested…AND LET GO! ‘How’ it comes about is truly the “domain of the Universe” as Mike Dooley says in the original version of The Secret DVD.

In fact, failure to let go sets us up for a vicious cycle. The more we worry about, and try to control, “how” our desires manifest, the more we are adding to the very resistance that keeps those goals at bay. Then, with proof that nothing is working, you have yet another excuse to conclude that the goal was an impossible dream.

If you’ve decided to become a conscious creator, you need to get out of the ‘how’ business. When we let go of the need to control exactly how our desires show up, we release the self-imposed limits on the possible ways our desires can manifest. As humans beings, we have a limited view of what can be accomplished, always based on what we are aware of that has already been done. Getting away from the need to know how is what is meant by “getting out of your own way”.

There’s no question that we DO benefit from pure, positive passion on your way to experience your desired goal, and the persistence to stay focused on the outcome regardless of any naysayers. That said, sometimes the very passion that drives us can cause us to want to know “how”. Successful people the world over know that you do not need to know “how” you will accomplish your goal in order to succeed. They realize that passion for the outcome and trust in the process are the big keys to successful conscious creating.

Jerry Hicks tells a story of how he and Esther had decided they wanted to take the Abraham materials to a wider audience. They happily told others about this, and when people asked how they were going to do it, they just said something to the effect of, “We don’t know right now, but we know the way will be shown.” Then, out of the (seeming) blue, Wayne Dyer and Christiane Northrup, M.D. contacted them to say how much they loved their materials and asking how they could help. Other notable authors and media people stepped forward to do the same. Louise Hay offered to publish their books to a wider audience. They were contacted by Rhonda Byrne to make The Secret movie (original version), which led to them creating their own movies and participating in Louise Hay’s You Can Heal Your Life. Along the way, Oprah called to interview them on her XM 156 Radio show.

All this happened for them because they put their desire out to the listening Universe and spent no time trying to second-guess the energy that creates worlds. They got out of their own way. Esther and Jerry considered what they wanted, focused on that, and trusted that it would show up for them…and it did! You wouldn’t know about all of their books, movies, or YouTube videos if this hadn’t happened for them.

The “Needing-to-Know-How” Addiction
Some people have been demanding to know how for so long that they’ve become addicted to needing to know, not to mention tallying up failures of past goals that never saw the light of day.

The addiction to knowing coupled with the lack of knowing keeps them stuck, in a perpetual (and emotionally exhausting) tug of war.

At the root of needing to know how your goal will manifest is a lack of trust in the energy that creates worlds, the one single source of all we perceive as humans: The Universal Energy field, sometimes known as Source Energy, Divine Source, All that Is, or God. Quantum Physicists have identified this energy field that permeates everything that we perceive with our senses, and have determined that this field of energy responds to and is affected by our thoughts and feelings.

Quantum Physicist Fred Alan Wolfe, PhD in the movie, The Secret, said,“Quantum Physics really begins to point to this discovery. It says that you can’t have the Universe without the mind entering into it.” He goes on to explain, The mind is actually shaping the very thing that is being perceived. Experiments with particles have shown them responding as soon as particles are being observed.

Whether you view this ever-present energy field in a religious, spiritual, or a scientific way, the fact still remains: The energy that permeates all things in the universe is constantly responding to our thoughts and feelings. If you trust this, then you will find it easier to let go of the ‘how’ and let this energy source assist you. It will respond to your trust by providing your deepest heart-felt desires.

If you do not trust this source, by virtue of your lack of trust, it will reflect back to you proof that you cannot trust it. The Law of Attraction ensures that whatever we believe is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Practice Shifting and Cultivating
So, what do you do if you are addicted to needing to know ‘how’ before you proceed? Start by practicing shifting your thinking and attitudes, and cultivate trust.

• Cultivating trust is like building muscles. Develop your trust muscle so you can easily imagine yourself living the outcome you desire. Spend a few minutes each day practicing— visualizing (see, feel, know) yourself living the outcome of the goal and noticing how it feels for you.

For example, if you want a good parking spot, imagine yourself driving to the location, finding the perfect spot and pulling right in without waiting.

Notice how you feel when you are visualizing (seeing, feeling, knowing) this. Feel yourself physically there in your visualization. Then, let it go and continue with your day. Resist the temptation to get into too much mental detail because that will lead you to ask ‘how’. Instead, focus on the feeling you want and are expecting to experience. Abraham refers to this technique as pre-paving a future experience. As you find yourself stepping into a future that matches your visualization (seeing, feeling, knowing), you know it’s not a coincidence.

• Start with smaller goals until you begin to trust that Universal Energy is constantly responding to meet your requests. We tend to be less attached to emotionally to smaller goals, so use that to it’s advantage if you are just starting out. As your trust deepens, you will find it easier to begin visualizing and feeling the outcome of much larger goals. Soon, you will find yourself trusting and knowing that everything you desire will manifest for you quickly and efficiently.

• Release emotional attachment to the outcome. I realize that the more emotionally attached we are to a certain outcome, the harder it can be to let go and trust. However, if you channel that emotion away from attachment and toward your visualization, you’ll notice something remarkable. The more emotion invested in the visualization, rather than the attachment, the more you will feel as if you are already living the desire you seek.

At that point, it’s only a matter of time for it to manifest. The creation process is well underway, and ironically, you are likely to feel less attached to the final outcome because you already have the satisfaction of feeling as if you are living that reality. And that makes you, and your goal, very attractive!

Feel the Outcome as Reality
How to do this? Let me share a personal experience from my own business.

One day I realized that a client had not paid a large project invoice by the milestone date. I called their accounting department to find out when payment would be made and was told they would “pay it when they got around to paying it.” I was incensed that this client corporation had me working around the clock and was extremely demanding, but was unwilling to pay their invoices on time. Soon, I found myself arguing with their Accounts Payable rep and heard my inner voice say, “Stop. Arguing is not helping.” I forced myself to end the conversation and hang up the phone, and needless to say—I was not in a very good mood!

Realizing that my energy was so negative that I would only attract similar energy by staying there, I immediately left my office. I sought out my kitty cat who always soothed me and lifted my energy. As I petted my kitty, I felt my heart warm and completely forget why I was mad in the first place. I stayed in that loving energy for a while, as it felt so good, and then began to think about the ideal outcome for the situation. All drama aside, the ideal outcome was to have possession of the client payment and deposit it into the bank.

So, I imagined myself holding the check, walking into the bank to make the deposit. I stayed with that visualization until it felt real to me. Then, I went back to petting my sweet kitty who was soaking up all the love.

Eventually, I made it back into my office and went back to work. I had let go of the outcome and trusted that what I visualized would show up. About three hours later, I received a call that the check was in the company’s lobby for me to pick up. It was not long before I was holding that check, walking into my bank to make the deposit just as I had visualized a few hours before!!!

Was it totally easy for me to get out of the “how” and shift my anger toward more productive visualization? It is easier now than it would have been 10 years ago, but it wasn’t totally easy, and frankly I needed the help of my furry friend to truly shift my energy to a higher vibration. (Furry friends are one of our greatest gifts!)

Could I have gotten there on my own? Probably, but not as quickly. If a kitty wasn’t present, I could have turned on some good music and danced, or put my attention on someone who always lifts my spirits. While it wasn’t easy, it was doable…and the more I do it, the easier it becomes.

In my example above, as I stepped out of the ‘how’ and focused on the outcome I desired, I gave the universe permission to fulfill my request in the fastest, most efficient way possible. I was then free to follow intuitve guidance. Jack Canfield has equated this to driving from NY to California at night with your headlights on, seeing only 200 feet ahead of you at any time, trusting that the road will take you to your final destination.

Have you been paralyzed to take action because you first needed to know how you would accomplish your goal? What has helped you to get out of your own way? Share your experiences with us below, in comments…

 Image credit: kasto

Finding Value in What You Offer

value

On Monday, I led a Business and Career call for Good Vibe University on the topic of Making Money Doing What You Love (Become a GVU member so you can have access to the recording.).

One of the questions on the call was, “How do we find value in the work we do?”

Since their work comes so easily to them, many creatives struggle to find the value in their art, music, dance, etc. They fail to see how much non-creatives value their fresh perspectives. Creatives open minds as well as hearts, inspiring and uplifting others.

Likewise, healers struggle to articulate the value of their offerings. Healers help those who cannot help themselves, often teaching new ideas about well-being along the way.

Just because what you do feels ‘easy’ for you doesn’t mean it has no value. In fact, the ease you feel is more likely an indication of your calling, and therefore, an even greater value to others.

If we’re unaware of our own value, it’s time to cultivate it…

    • Focus on past successes – One of the ways I was able to find value was to remember all the successes I had experienced in the past, from school, college, and all the jobs I held prior to starting my business. The last job I had before I started my design business was very similar, so I was able to find many examples. Make a list of the ways you’ve been of value to others, whether as an employee, self-employed, or as a volunteer.
    • Track appreciation – If you haven’t already started a warm-fuzzy file of positive remarks from bosses, co-workers, or clients, this is a good time to start one. You could also add it to your daily work journal. Find a way to start tracking the positive comments and responses all around you. What you focus on will expand, including the positive comments from others. In the process, you’ll begin to see your own value.
    • Go within and FEEL it – Whether you’re just starting out or have been in business for decades, one thing all of us can do is…get quiet, go within, connect with Source, and FEEL our intrinsic value. All of us have a unique gift that only we can offer the world, which means we ALL have value, if we’re willing to see and feel it. For some it’s how they interact with people or objects, while others are exceptionally good at communicating, or creating something new from scratch. By going within and dwelling on what makes us unique, we prime ourselves to become more aware of and capable of expressing our value.
    • Affirm it every day – You’ve heard me say that EVERYTHING we think, speak, and write is an affirmation. We are either affirming what we want, or the opposite. (HINT: If you don’t want what you are thinking, speaking, or writing to be true, then it’s a clue that you’re creating what you don’t want.) Create your own unique and powerful affirmations. Affirm your value, affirm your skills, affirm your uniqueness, affirm your capabilities, affirm what you like about yourself. The more you affirm about yourself, the more your subconscious is impressed with the message and begins finding ways to mirror the affirmations back to you.

Affirmations work really well for right-brain dominant creatives. However, left-brain dominant analytical thinkers often struggle with affirmations. For the latter group, I recommend Afformations – affirmative questions, such as: “Why do my clients find me/my services so valuable?” “Why am I so unique and capable?” Why am I so skilled and appreciated?”

    • Keep your ‘Value Pipeline’ filled – The Universe is a BIG YES MACHINE, mirroring back whatever we believe about ourselves. Any of the tools mentioned above can help you get in touch with your own value. When you look for proof of past successes, track your existing successes, cultivate the feeling of value within, and affirm it (and/or afform it) regularly, your value will be mirrored back to you.

Once your pipeline is primed, and you are feeling your value, a lot of people stop…they get sidetracked…their connection to their value dips, and they have to start all over again. Prime your Value Pipeline and keep adding successes, meditating on your intrinsic value, and affirming. When contrast comes along, you’ll find the primed pipeline helps support you emotionally, and makes you mentally stronger.

Are there other ways that you have been able to feel the value in the work you do? Share them with us below in the comments…

Image credit: rangizz

Deciding To Embrace Change

change

[This article was previously published on AffirmingSpirit.com. It has been revised and updated for the enjoyment of blog-readers.]

Recently, I wrote an article about the incredible power of decision, about how just deciding what you want can create the opportunities for that creation to appear in your life. Our decisions, whether conscious or unconscious, align us with the vibrational equivalents for opportunities and actions. In this post, I’m inviting you to consider whether you’ve made, or are ready to make, the decision to change what isn’t working in your life.

To Decide or Not to Decide: Is CHANGE the Question?

A few months ago, during a coaching session, the client brought up three experiences that were upsetting her. To her, these experiences were unrelated, but they all frustrated her. As I listened, I could hear the common thread in what she was saying: All three of her experiences reflected that she felt unappreciated for her hard work, and in some cases, disrespected by people around her.

When I brought this to her attention, she was surprised as she had not seen the commonality in her experience until that moment. I told her the good news is that she could decide to change right there, right that minute while we were talking. All she had to do was embrace the decision to change. She could begin by creating positive self-talk affirmations such as

I am respected and appreciated by everyone around me, and I respect and appreciate myself!

I allow others to respect me, and show it in positive ways!

Everyone I interact with treats me with respect and appreciation!

It’s Easier to Change Than Remain Suffering

The gal I was coaching was ready to make a change. She had reached a point where she no longer wanted to experience those same frustrations, and she recognized a long-standing pattern in her life that needed to change if she was going to move forward.

So, she embraced these new affirmations immediately, saying them with conviction and belief that she was already creating what she wanted. Within 24 hours, she reported noticing respectful and appreciative behavior all around her…particularly from the people she previously felt were not behaving that way!

Her discovery? What she wanted was all around her as soon as she was open to seeing it. While she was convinced that others were disrespectful, that is how she perceived others’ behavior and that is what showed up for her. As soon as she changed her focus, what she perceived and experienced changed as well.

When we talked afterward, she shared that making this shift in perception helped her to appreciate life so much more than before she had reached out for help during coaching. That comment made it clear to me that choosing to make positive changes is far more rewarding than staying in suffering. Our egos will convince us that change is not possible…it’s too difficult…it can’t be done…it’s better to stay where you are. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Changing is really easier than most people think, and it starts by making the decision to change.

Are You Ready for Change?

In the above example, if she had not been ready to change, she wouldn’t have been able to do the affirmations with feeling and would not have seen any changes. She may even have found excuses why she didn’t have time or energy to say the affirmations…or kept forgetting to say them. This is just resistance to change. Most people think change will be too painful, but the truth is NOT changing is often more painful.

How do you know you are ready for change? You can feel it. You know you are ready when you realize what you are experiencing is not working for you, when you are open to suggestions for shifting (like saying affirmations), when you can feel your life could be better and you are no longer willing to repeat the same mistakes. You can feel it inside yourself that it’s time…and, if you aren’t sure you can do it by yourself, you begin considering reaching out for help.

Likewise, when you aren’t ready, you’ll find all kinds of excuses to not reach out for help. Suddenly, you’ll create tons of reasons that tell you, “now isn’t the right time”. Follow what feels best to you, and you will take action when it’s the right time for you.

This is Your Life: There’s No Wrong Answer

Keep in mind that there is no wrong answer when it comes to your life. If you are choosing to stay where you are, that is because it is right for what you need to experience in this moment. As soon as you are ready to embrace change, you will find the help you need and begin taking appropriate steps.

In the meantime, love and accept yourself for who you are and how wonderful your life really is!

Image Credit: Composite by Barry-Jansson & Associates,

created from separate images by CZANY and jannoon028.

Your Body Compass

Body Compass

Have you heard the term ‘Body Compass’ and do you know how it can help you every day?

After sharing my blog post about the incredible power of decision, I received a bunch of emails and messages from people saying that they find it hard to know which decision is right for them. While many liked the idea of following what feels better, the question remained: “How do you know when every choice feels both good and bad?”

I’ve briefly mentioned the Body Compass before, but it makes sense to devote an entire post to this topic.

In our heavily plugged-in lives, constantly on the computer, or our phone, juggling virtual and real-life deadlines, dramas, and details, we’ve become increasingly disconnected from our bodies. We need a way to navigate the world than electronics can provide.

Thirty years ago, I would have made most of my difficult decisions by making a pros/cons list. Since then, I discovered the power of the Body Compass to guide me in making good decisions in even the most difficult situations.

What is the ‘Body Compass’ ?

Just as a magnetic compass can help us navigate the globe, the Body Compass uses the human body to guide decision-making and receive guidance. Our bodies are an amazing collection of energetic sensors which are always providing us with feedback. These sensors are so fine tuned, work well together, and these sensors let us know what matters to us physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

Like any tool, you have to know you have it AND how to use it, to reap the benefit.

5 Steps to Tap Into Your Own Body Compass

Here are 5 steps to become receptive to and use the information from your Body Compass:

  1. BREATHE, slow down, and relax – Take 3 deep breaths. Be still. Get out into nature. Put your bare feet on the ground. Release the mental snowballs. If you must remain inside, step away from the electronics. Go get a drink of water, walk around a moment, or take a bathroom break. We think much better and can connect with our Body Compass when we are not mired in the stress. First, we have to release any stress in our system.
  2. Get into heart coherence – After your cleansing deep breaths, lower your head as if you are looking at your own heart while putting your hand on your heart. This is a quick action that puts your heart into a coherent state which then signals your organs to function in harmony with each other. (If you want to know more about Heart Coherence, visit the HeartMath Institute’s site.)
  3. Bring your question to mind – Some find it helpful to write the question on paper first, so that they can look at the question anew once they are in a more relaxed state. Don’t try to ‘think’. Just be aware of your question, and move to the next step.
  4. Notice what sensations or feelings show up in your body along with thoughts – For instance, you might feel tightness around your gut / solar plexus at the same time you have a memory flash in your mind. There’s a connection between the sensation and the thoughts/memories that arise. You might experience an emotional release, such as crying, sighing, yawning, coughing, sneezing. Let it happen, and see what awareness you have afterward.
  5. Use the information that surfaces to show you what feels best – Often one option will feel slightly better, if not much better, than the others. Sometimes one idea feels lighter in the body, than the other. Choose the best, lightest feeling option.

You might have to practice feeling your body from the inside-out.Many of us have been socialized to only feel what happens to the outside of our bodies (scrapes, cuts, bruises), not what’s going on inside, especially if it’s emotional. When you are willing to slow down and really feel your body from the inside, you’ll start to notice all kinds of sensations.

There are several ways to practice. Meditation can help you become aware of your body while it is still, and relatively relaxed.

You can also practice scanning your body as you fall asleep at night…or just as you wake up. Let your awareness scan your body from the top of your head to the soles of your feet, and back up to the crown of your head. Notice what you feel and what thoughts arise.

The other day, I used my Body Compass to see where I was creating unnecessary drama and frustration. As I looked at my To-Do list that day, suddenly 5 items seemed very urgent. Drop-what-you-are-doing-urgent. Not only that, they each had specific requirements, so they needed to be done in a specific order, which made each more complicated. I found myself being paralyzed with the feeling of urgency, and then came the indecision. No matter how I looked at these 5 items, they needed to be done and they were getting in each others way!

Fortunately, the indecision reminded me of my Body Compass. (See? Contrast has its blessings!) I got quiet, centered, and heart-coherent. I looked at each item on my list, and noticed how my body felt. In a flash, I suddenly realized that *I* was the only person claiming that three of these tasks were ‘urgent’. In that realization, it became crystal clear that a few things didn’t even need to be done…at all! Ever. Unless I wanted to do them. They were options, but I had turned them into ‘shoulds’.

I let out a big sigh. I immediately felt the stress drain away from the dilemma, and my next course of action was clear: The other two items didn’t need to happen TODAY. They could easily be done the next day. What a relief! What seemed like an urgent quagmire had quickly become easy and doable.

Once you learn to understand your Body Compass and use it regularly, you’ll find it one of the most helpful tools for growing a thriving business. It’s always with you, and it’s free. You just have to CHOOSE to remember it and use it!

Your turn…Are you ready to start putting your Body Compass to work for you? If you already do, what experiences have you had with your Body Compass? Share your insights below.

 

Composite Image credit: Barry-Jansson & Associates,
Resource files via paffy, and lightwise.

The Incredible Power of Decision

decision

[This article about the power of decision first appeared on AffirmingSpirit.com. It has been revised and updated for the enjoyment of blog-readers.]

The Law of Attraction is part of my daily life now, and applying the techniques has become second-nature to me. Not only am I experiencing great results, I have discovered deeper elements to experiencing success. None is more telling, more potent or more closely tied to success than the incredible power of decision.

Decisions: Left Brain or Right Brain?

Decision is normally thought of as a left-brain thought process, a logical activity devoid of emotion that functions from analyzing data and making a choice. However, I’ve discovered that decisions have a hidden emotional element, that when ignored leads to disastrous results.

Furthermore, when one choice feels better, it is divine guidance, if you will, to move in a certain direction. Ignoring that emotional guidance is usually what creates most human drama. We want to do one thing because it feels better, but we convince ourselves we can’t have what we want (pick your reason, it doesn’t matter) and decide not to follow the course that feels best.

Instead, we slug forward with a decision that feels awful and brings even worse results. That push-pull sets up the drama and the heartache. Without doubt, that is the fastest recipe for failure and a miserable life.

Many people decide, before even trying, that they cannot afford (financially, emotionally, physically, or spiritually) to take a certain action and, in that decision, they squash any possibility for success before they’ve even started. They spend the rest of their life wondering “what if” and playing the push-pull scenario over and over in their heads.

Emotions and Decisions

Decisions, like other thoughts, are made of energy frequencies that include emotional energy. The level of emotion for each decision is based on how connected we are to the expected outcome.

For instance, the decision to use your life savings to start a business might have a relatively high emotion-to-outcome factor, compared to deciding what to have for breakfast or where to park our car.

However, that same decision regarding your life savings might have a lower emotion-to-outcome factor if you have a supportive partner who is making plenty of money to cover monthly expenses for the foreseeable future.

Quantum physics has shown us that everything around us is made up of possibilities and probabilities of conscious always-in-motion Source Energy. Thoughts and emotions are made of this same conscious Source Energy, moving through all matter and across all space and time.

In the decision-making process, when we take a moment to connect to our inner guidance, Source Energy, with practice we can clearly tell which ideas feel best. Which possibilities feel best.

While women are often raised to acknowledge and use their intuition regularly, men still use theirs but interpret it more as a gut feeling. There’s nothing woo-woo about it—the body’s compass is giving us feedback on our thoughts all the time.

As we take notice of the better feeling thoughts, and move toward them, we become even more attuned to better feeling thoughts. Results of our actions reflect the energy with which those actions were taken.

Honing this gift of guidance, turning to it for every decision, the guidance develops into intuition you can always trust. Those who have been deemed visionaries invariably follow their gut feeling, even when everyone else around them are telling them to do something else!

Guidance from Source Energy is unique to each individual, so what feels good to one person—the one meant to take the related action—usually does not feel good to those who are not called to take action. This is why it makes no sense to ask others what they think/feel about guidance you’ve received.

Using our power to decide, in itself, releases stuck energy and sets up powerful momentum. Rather than being stuck in the quagmire of competing options and doubts, making a conscious and clear decision has within it the power to move us forward toward our goal. We’re essentially fine-tuning the signal we’re sending to the multiverses.

Life…A Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

Norman Vincent Peale always said that life is a self-fulfilling prophecy, meaning that life gives you what you believe it will give you. This means you are always right. If you believe you will succeed in life, you are right. If you believe you’ll fail in life, you are right. If you believe people are trying to hurt you, they will. If you believe people are conspiring to help you, they will.

The Law of Attraction set us up to experience what we believe, what we expect, by delivering experiences of equal vibration to our dominant thoughts. If you think you need to be college-educated to succeed, but can’t afford to be college-educated, then by default of the first decision you have already decided that you cannot succeed. Until you decide that the first thought no longer serves you, and create a new thought to operate from, you will remain stuck in a can’t-succeed cycle.

The good news…you can always change your thoughts! It’s never too late to decide to incorporate thoughts that serve you. Whether you choose to use affirmations alone or use a combination of affirmations with other techniques,

When you truly decide, you get clear in your intention, and when combined with positive emotion that clarity brings swift results. With clarity aligned with joy and enthusiasm, Source Energy is now activated to assist you in receiving what you’ve asked for.

You are then positioned to take action that feels more like play than work. You’ll stay with the process longer and more enthusiastically because the journey feels so good. So, not only is the decision clear, but the action that follows is also full of positive energy. What an unbeatable combination!

Don’t worry if you don’t know which steps to take next, after the decision. The decision itself, with enhanced clarity, will start to reveal the next steps. But nothing happens, until a decision is made.

Make a Decision Today

Ask yourself…

Am I living the life I want to live?

Am I experiencing joy and enthusiasm on a regular basis?

If not, make a decision today that the next time you are faced with any decision, you will make a conscious effort to choose the option that feels best to you.

Decide you live in a benevolent universe that is always supporting your choices.

Decide that Source Energy is providing the good feeling as a way to guide you to the best action for you.

Decide that you will live the life you really want to live!

With the momentum of each decision, opportunities will begin showing up to support you. Don’t take my word for it. Give it a try!

If you’ve already experienced the power of decision, share your decision AHAs below in the comments…

Image credit: hkeita

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